A life so changed
by EredLuin
Summary: The White Star Line s officers are preparing for Titanic s maiden voyage. Little does Mr. Murdoch know, that a far greater adventure lies ahead of him. One that would change his life forever...
1. Home

Disclaimer: I do not own anything about Titanic, except the few characters I invented on my own. The others are owned by James Cameron or by themselves.

I also apology for wrong spelling and poor grammar, but English is not my native language. So please, don´t be too harsh with me.

Summary:  
William Murdoch has accepted his fate as a lonely bachelor and is utterly devoted to his job as an Officer if White Star Line. A few months before Titanic´s maiden voyage, the newly found Chief Officer has returned to Southampton prepare for the giant event, not knowing that a far greater adventure lies ahead of him. One that will change his whole life forever.

December 4th, 1911

It was just around 6 o´clock in the morning, when William McMaster Murdoch found himself already awake. This was awfully strange due to the circumstance that he had just returned from his last voyage. Southampton – New York and back with White Star Line´s newest, grandest and finest ship, the Olympic.

Murdoch stretched his limbs like a giant cat after a long desired night of good sleep in his own bed at home. Not that he disliked being (and sleeping) on a vessel. Quite the contrary. Like his father and all his grandfathers and grandgrandfathers Will Murdoch was a fine Scottish sailor, loving the world´s oceans with heart and soul.  
But he couldn´t also deny, that after weeks and months on duty returning home was an appreciated value.

He optioned for a moment if he should get up already, but decided to stay a little while longer in the warm sanctuary of his bed. His double-bed to be precise. Somewhat melancholy he touched the soft pillow next to his own, his eyes lingering on the unoccupied space.

His devotion for the sea and seafaring was a truly deep one, was his true home and his companions a second and beloved family. But truth to be told he sometimes missed having a loving girl or woman in his life, especially in those moments when he returned home.

However, there had never been someone who wanted to be with him. When he was younger and nothing but a mere sailor constantly travelling to press ahead with his career, girls thought him too poor, too often away and just too unstable to marry, let alone to build a family with.

Now he was proud to be First Officer and Chief Officer to become, to have gained a small asset due to a good payment and living a humble life and to own a fine little house of his own in Southampton, but he had nobody to share. With his thirtyeight years, soon to be thirtynine, most young women found him too old. He on the other side was not overly fond about the idea of courting a widow or an old maid. He had always dreamed about having children of his own, not about raising those of another man together with a mourning wife.

No, Will Murdoch had accepted that he would live and certainly die as a lonely bachelor on sea and although he was not entirely happy about it, he didn´t regret it either.

He yawned, realizing that he could use an hour or two more, cuffed his pillow in a comfortable position and went to sleep once more.

A gentle knock on the door stirred him anew and his bedside clock told him that it was now ´bout nine o´clock. "Bloody Hell" he swore, having slept far longer than he intended to.

He got out of bed and quickly put on his uniform-shirt, having slept in the trousers all night long. He had been just too tired to change into his pajamas when he had reached his bed last night.

A second knock followed and a cheerful voice reached his ears, causing him to smile. "Come on Willie darling, a nice hot coffee is waiting for you boy, as well as a bath and some clean clothes."

Murdoch opened the door to find an elderly woman waiting outside, a tray with a cup of coffee in her hands.

"My apologies Mrs. Cummings, I forgot time this morning", he replied sheepishly, "and thank you very much for always being around every time I come home".

Mrs. Cummings handed him his coffee and shook her head disapprovingly. "It´s nothing pup, how often do I have to tell you? I know you need me, need someone to be around and look after you. And the house you know. I would love to see you trying to dust and clean it on your own after all the weeks it´s unoccupied. " Mrs. Cummings continued her rambling as she headed for the stairs. When she noticed that Murdoch wasn´t right on her heels, she turned around and put her hands on her hips. "Young man, come on now. Look at you, you would make a fine gangster with that awful stubble in your face and your wrinkled clothes. You do not want to stay that way, do ya? Keeps all the nice lasses away, you know?"

Murdoch smiled at the matron in front of him and started to follow her down the stairs. "You know that I am not a young man anymore, Mrs. Cummings. And about the lasses…"

"William McMaster Murdoch!" There it was. That glare that could turn a fire into ice. "I will hear nothing of it. It is about time that you got yourself a nice woman to have around you. This house needs a female touch, as do you. So stop that fussing about yourself being old and such."

"Aye Ma´am", Murdoch shouted with a mock salute. He knew Mrs. Cummings just wanted his best. She was an old widow and had lost her only son several years ago in a terrible accident at work. So when Murdoch bought the house next to her own seven years ago, she was overly happy to have someone to attend to again. She had nearly adopted him the day they met and now looked after his house when he was at work and after himself when he returned home. And to say the least, he was more than happy to have her around.

After a hot bath, a good shave and clean fresh clothes they sat together in Murdochs kitchen by the window, sharing a breakfast Mrs. Cummings had prepared.

"So son, tell me. What is your schedule for the next weeks? How long do you plan to stay?" Mrs. Cummings finally asked.

Murdoch took a hearty bite off his buttered slice of bread and mumbled: "I´m actually staying quite a time now. See, in April the Titanic will be send on her maiden voyage and I am to be Chief Officer this time."

"My Will…congratulations darling, there´s no one to deserve this more. I´m proud of you dear boy".

Murdoch beamed with pride when Mrs. Cummings had to dry her eyes from some happy tears that slid down her wrinkled cheeks. He didn´t mind that she treated him most of the time as if he were a mere schoolboy, in fact it amused him to no end.

"Thanks Mrs. Cummings. I have to admit, I´m quite proud myself. Being Chief Officer means a lot responsibility and since Titanic is world´s grandest ship, there´s still a mass of things to do before she will sail in April. Due to that I am commanded to be around and watch over the preparations. The White Star Line is desperate to make it a flawless event with all those celebrities attending. It´s the Titanic after all. I have a few days off now and then work starts all over again but I shall stay on shore until April."

Mrs. Cummings frowned slightly. Murdoch laughed at that. "You seem not too happy about that".

This only earned him another glare. "Don´t be ridiculous, Will. I love every day you are home, boy and you do know that. It´s just that ship. Titanic. Do not get me wrong, I am not superstitious or something. But…they call the Titanic unsinkable and I do not like it. It´s like challenging fate or you know… HIM."

Murdoch smiled at her and patted the old womans arm reassuringly. "Don´t worry Mrs. Cummings. Truth to be told, no ship in the world is unsinkable. But the Titanic is as unsinkable as a ship can be. And I assure you, I will make it to New York and back safe and sound. I promise."

By the looks she gave him he could see that she was not entirely convinced. But who could have hard feelings against her? After losing husband and son she had become overly protective about everyone she loved in her life and Will Murdoch called himself a happy and deeply honored man to be one of those.


	2. A naked truth

Disclaimer: Same as for the last chapter. Just have a look there

Although he had a full week for free, Will Murdoch looked forward to work again. He had done several errands like buying food, sending a letter to his family in Dalbeattie and cleaning his house under the watchful eyes of Mrs. Cummings.

He had reread his favorite book and taken long walks in the afternoon and tried to keep himself busy.

But it didn´t keep him from feeling lonely. The older he got the more did he miss something in his life. Or someone. Someone who definitely wouldn´t come.

When he woke up on Friday morning he sighed somewhat relieved. Finally this whole damn week of freetime would be over soon. On Monday morning work would keep him luckily from brooding over futile wishes and dreams.

He rather looked forward to his invitation to the Lightollers this evening. Charles was his best friend for long years now and he lived with his darling wife Sylvia and his two cute children a few streets away from his own place in Southampton. Lights – as he was called – had told him that he would be welcome to join him and his family every evening, but he didn´t want to impose on his friend.

Murdoch knew how precious it was for Sylvia to have her husband at home without having to share him with a ship or one of his comrades. And secretly, Will envied his friend for his family.

But tonight Lights and Sylvia had insisted him to come over and have dinner with them. It was an invitation he couldn´t reject.

When the doorbell rang in the afternoon, Will got up from his reading in his study and walked to answer the door. Outside stood Mrs. Cummings with his uniforms in her hands.

"Nice and clean again my boy", the old woman chirped as Will took the heavy clothes from her. "Got it fresh from the dry-cleaners!"

Will frowned. "Mrs. Cummings," he gave her a stern look. "I told you to not to get them alone. You know very well that they are way too heavy for you to carry. And you know also what the doctor said about your backache."

Mrs. Cummings didn´t seem to be too impressed by his words. "Just save that officer-glare for your fellows, dear. Especially for that impossible friend of yours you are going to visit tonight. It will remain a riddle to me forever how this man has gotten the rank as a Second Officer."

William rolled his eyes behind her back. "First Officer to be precise. When I become Chief Officer on Titanic, Lights will get my recent position as First Officer."

Mrs. Cummings snorted. "That bloke becomes First Officer? Good Lord, now I am completely confessed that this", she spat the next words with obvious disdain, "unsinkable ship is doomed to rot in hell. Just make sure you get yourself out soon enough, do you?"

To say that Mrs. Cummings was not too fond over Mr. Lightoller was clearly an understatement. Due to Lights´ sense of mischief and his constant liability to play pranks on people, including Mrs. Cummings and Will, the elder woman was eager to remind her "adoptee" of her dislike of his best friend.  
Will sighed. "Mrs. Cummings, I understand that you and Charles won´t get friends in this life or in another one. But I would appreciate if you could give him his thoroughly deserved respect for his nautical skills", he defended his friend.

"Whatever", the matron mumbled, "but I swear, if he ever lets a dog loose again on my cat again, I´ll stuck my scrubber just right inside his.."

"His what?", teased Murdoch, "didn´t get the last part of what you said."

Mrs. Cummings glared at him. "He´s got a bad influence on you. Sometimes you surely are a pain in my neck."

Murdoch chuckled slightly. "Maybe I am. But you know that Lights DID apologize for that dog-incident." He visibly remembered the day, when Lightoller came around nursing that giant dog of Sylvias sister. At the same time Mrs. Cummings´s cat took a napkin in the garden, when the dog suddenly spotted it and all hell broke loose. In the end, Mrs. Cummings´s garden looked as if an army had stomped through, Lights and Murdoch were covered in dirt from capturing that blasted dog and the poor cat had fled onto the highest tree available.

"Shame on you, William! You´re putting that lousy nuisance over me."

Murdoch patted her shoulder. "I would never dream about doing that."

"Ever the ladies men, aren´t we?"

Murdoch bowed deeply. " You´re personal Knight in shining armour is always at your service, Ma´am. Would you like a cup of tea actually?"

Mrs. Cummings shook her head about his pompous behavior. "I am deeply ashamed, my knight in shining armor, but I´m already having tea with Lucille today. She´ll be coming in a few minutes actually."

Murdoch patted her gently on the shoulder. "Have fun then Mrs. Cummings. And thank you again for fetching my uniforms."

"You´re welcome, love. See you tomorrow."

xxxxxxxxxxxxx

At exact seven o´clock Will rang the doorbell at the Lightoller´s and was greeted by a smiling Sylvia Lightoller a second later.  
"Will, it´s so good to see you." She gave him a gentle hug and ushered him inside the house.

"Thanks for inviting me tonight", Will replied and took her hand to place a chaste kiss upon it.

Sylvia giggled a bit. "It´s always strange to see you not wearing your uniform, Will," she said while looking critically at his clothes.

Murdoch lifted an eyebrow. "Do you have the same problems with Charles?" he asked playfully.

Before Sylvia could make a replay a male voice answered: "Of course she has. That´s why I´m usually naked around her when I´m not wearing my uniform. To assure that she recognizes me, you know?"

"A good evening to you as well, Lights", Murdoch replied with a smirk, "Do you suggest then, that I should divest myself of my clothing?"

Sylvia was blushing madly but Lights seemed thoroughly unabashed. "If you´d like Will, be my guest. But you should know that I have throw you overboard once when we get onto the Titanic."

"You´re threatening your Chief Officer, sir?"

"No, I´m just threatening my pervert best friend."

Murdoch snorted. "Who´s the perverted one here?"

Sylvia Lightoller shook her head. "Men", she muttered under her breath. "If you´d be so kind as to follow me to the dining room, gentlemen. I suggest that we have our dinner before everything gets cold."

"Aye ma´am" both men shouted in union, following her to the dining table.

xxxxxxxxxxxxx

She was running for her dear life. The cold air stung in her lungs und her legs were burning from overexertion. But she kept running as fast as she could. She knew that they would catch her if she granted herself a break. And that would be the end. They would undoubtedly kill her in an instant.

Her body screamed in pain and she knew that she could not go on like this much longer. She needed to hide somewhere. She could hear them shout at each other. They had not spotted her yet but they would in a short time, that was for sure.

The moment she thought she would collapse from exhaustion she noticed the open door of one of the warehouses. She slid inside and closed the door as silent as possible. Now the only thing she could do was to wait. And to pray. She suppressed the urge to take a deep breath, fearing they would hear her panting. Carefully not to open the door too wide, she peeked outside.

The two arguing figures came nearer to her hiding place. "She can´t have vanished into thin air. She has to be somewhere around. We must find her or the boss will kill us."

She caught her breath when the men jogged past her door. They were looking for her but they had luckily missed her behind her door.

Slowly the voices started to quiet down.

Letting out the breath she was holding she slid down the door and cried silently. She was going to survive this. At least for now.

As silent as possible she sneaked out of the warehouse and started to run again through the darkness. She had to get to the police immediately.


	3. The damsel in distress

Disclaimer: You know already

_I would like to thank those who have reviewed and I hope that you enjoy the story. Actually a great deal of it will take place before the maiden voyage. I love those stories where Murdoch and his girl meet on Titanic a lot, but I always find it difficult to believe that people can fall in love with each other THAT quickly. I also felt that way about Jack and Rose in the movie. So I decided to grant my characters a little bit more time to get to know each other. Don´t get me wrong, a story like mine also would never ever have happened. But we can still dream, can´t we?_

xxxxxxx

Charles Lightoller yawned heartily. He leaned back in his office chair, stretched his arms over his head and sighed deeply.

William Murdoch looked up from his scribbling and glanced at his friend. "Are we tired already Mr. Lightoller?"

Lights just nodded his head lazily before crossing his hands behind it. "Tired is an understatement. Exhausted would be more suitable for my current state of mind."

Murdoch gave him a disapproving glare. "Would you be so kind as to inform me about the source of your suffering? `Cause I haven´t seen you rise a finger the whole day."

Lights snorted. "There you have it. Working in an office is so bloody boring that my extraordinary mind is just overcharged. And that happens to be not only annoying but also completely exhausting."

Murdoch frowned. "It looks to me as if you were but rather subchallenged. Maybe I should consign you to do something more trying."

"Don´t you dare…"

Murdoch sighed heavily and gave his friend a stern look. "You are my best friend Lights, but at the moment you´re my subordinate officer. I don´t like office work either, but I won´t cover up for you again this week. Do me a favor and just complete your orders. "

Lightoller rolled his eyes. "Bloody hell Will, why are so damn proper and dutiful ALL the time?"

"Because at least one of us has to be."

"I´m serious Will. We are supposed to inherit the highest officer ranks on the grandest ship in the world. I wasn´t aware that it meant sitting at a desk for weeks and checking indexes of names of the staff or looking over supplies and cargo holds."

Murdoch sighed. "Look Lights, I can assure you that I also prefer sailing over paperwork. But what we are doing IS important and it´s not only looking over the cargo. At the moment I am studying and upgrading the plans for the sea trials in Belfast, for example. I would not classify that task as a boring one."

Lightoller snorted. "Of course…Mr. Perfect is given the fun part." But when he spotted Murdoch´s evil eye on him, he added quickly: "Calm down Will. I won´t get you in trouble. Tomorrow I will be your humble servant, but for today I prefer to keep lazy."

Murdoch shook his head over his friend but couldn´t hold back a light chuckle. "I will remind you of that tomorrow."

He had just gone back to his studies (while Lights had ensconced himself in his chair for a little napkin) when the door burst open and a young man wearing a uniform came dashing through the door.

Both men were so startled from the sudden noise, that Murdoch threw away the pencil he was chewing at and Lightoller toppled over his chair. "Blimey!", he swore when he climbed back from under his desk, "what the hell has gotten into you, lad?"

The boy was blushing madly. "I´m deeply sorry for the disturbance, sirs. But I was send here to inform one certain Officer William Murdoch that his presence is urgently awaited tomorrow morning at precisely eight o´clock."

Lightoller burst into laughter but Murdoch silenced him with a stern glare. Clearly sensing the boys distress he turned to him and asked friendly: "I am William Murdoch. Thank you for delivering that message, Mr…?" "Potter, sir. Thomas Potter"

"Mr. Potter then. But where am I to go tomorrow? Who send you?"

Thomas Potter´s face got even more crimson when he realized his mistake. "I apologize, sir. Mr. Ismay ordered me here. He awaits you at his bureau tomorrow. He said he had something of extreme importance to discuss with you."

Murdoch flashed Lights a surprised glance before turning back to Mr. Potter. "And do you know by chance the nature of that meeting, Mr. Potter?"

The young man shook his head. "I´m sorry, sir. But I wasn´t instructed any further than I have told you."

"No need to apologize, Mr. Potter. Thank you for your service. Do you want me to send Mr. Ismay a written reply? To ensure him that you fulfilled your task?"

"That would be most kind, sir."

"You´re welcome Mr. Potter." Murdoch knew how unpleasant working with Mr. Ismay could be, especially for those in the lower ranks. He wrote down a quick note that he would be present at the requested meeting and handed it to a grateful Mr. Potter.

The moment the boy closed the door to their shared office, Lightoller let out a breath he was holding. "If it was somebody else than you, I would think a reprimand is awaiting you."

Murdoch shook his head. "Don´t be ridiculous, Lights. Why should I be reprimanded? I can´t remember doing anything wrong. But truthfully, I have no idea of what lies ahead of me."

Lights noticed the slight unease in his friends voice, despite his confident words. "Nae Will, I was just kidding. Maybe a raise of salary is in order."

"Nice imagination, Lights. But I don´t think that Mr. Ismay would do that in person. I´ll just have to wait and see, I think." Murdoch looked at his friend. "You know what? Let´s get out of here. I think I am jolly well fed up with work for now. "

Lightoller didn´t complain.

xxxxxx

Murdoch awoke the next morning with a severe headache. A look on his bedside clock told him, that it was half past five now. Will groaned. He hadn´t slept well the night because he had that nagging feeling that something awkward was lying ahead of him.

Desperate to freshen up, he left his bed and went to the bathroom to splash some cold water into his face. He then poured himself a hot bath and clean shaved his face while the water was running into his tub. The muscles in his neck gradually relaxed when he slid into the warm water and Murdoch sighed in relief. Grateful that he had awoken so early, he enjoyed his bath a bit longer than he normally did, before he got out of the tub and dried himself of.

With the towel slung around his hips he went to his bedroom again and pulled out a clean uniform together with fresh underwear, socks and a new tie. He took his time dressing himself, because he wanted to look as presentable as possible. After all, he was supposed to meet the director of the White Star Line himself.

After finishing his clothes, he looked critically at himself in the mirror. He definitely looked proper.

"If you are going to perish today, you´ll do it at least looking the best way possible." he thought, before adjusting his officers hat on his head.

He clad himself in his warm greatcoat and his leather gloves for it was a really cold day and left his house.

The office he shared with Lightoller was at the docks but White Star Line´s headquarter in Southampton lay in the midst of the city, not far away from his house at Belmond road.

His thoughts kept rambling in the short walk and he felt a good deal of nervousness creeping up his spine when he looked up at the lighted windows of the headquarters.

Stepping inside the building he immediately spotted the receptionist. He drew off his officers hat as he walked up to her.

"Good morning, miss. I´m Officer William Murdoch. Mr. Ismay requested my presence this morning."

The woman shot him a curious glance and then started smiling.

"Good morning to you, Mr. Murdoch. Mr. Ismay is indeed awaiting you. Please go upstairs till you reach the second floor. You will find Mr. Ismay and the other gentlemen in the third room on the right."

_The other gentlemen?_ "Thank you, Miss. Have a nice day." Murdoch tipped his head and was about to leave for the stairs when the receptionist shot him a mischievous grin and winked.

Murdoch looked back rather puzzled but the woman pretended to be busy with some paperwork on her desk.

Shaking his head Murdoch started to jog upwards. What the hell was going on here?

When he reached the first floor, he heard it for the first time. Above him someone was arguing and shouting. _Sounds like a woman, _Will thought and headed for the next stair.

The shouting grew louder; it was undoubtedly coming from the right side. Something told him that the source of that noise was coming from exact where he was going.

"No way I´m giving into this!" a completely enraged female voice shouted.

"Miss…we will not discuss this again.", someone – definitely a man – answered surprisingly stern and calm. "Oh but we will, Mr. Jackson. Your suggestion is completely out of question. I´m not one of your or his daft inferiors. " Bloody hell, that woman WAS angry about something.

"Listen Miss. Mr. Jackson here is just trying to assure your safety, we all do. The man´s about to arrive and you will..", that was Mr. Ismay from what he could tell, but he was rudely interrupted.

"I do not give a damn about who is to be arrived. I WILL NOT be ordered around like a dumbass by some MEN!" She spat the word "men" as if it was something completely abhorrent.

Slowly Murdoch peeked through the glass of the door and spotted to his utter surprise Mr. Ismay, two men he didn´t know but who looked like some police-officers, Captain Smith (_What the hell is HE doing here?)_and last but not least the backside of a very small dark-haired woman. And she was enraged. It still remained a complete riddle to him why he was here at all, but Murdoch stepped quietly through the door. The woman did not even hear him. Instead she slammed her hands down on Mr. Ismays desk, who actually backed away a little bit, spotted Murdoch by the door and shot him a help-seeking look.

The woman started her shouting again. "If you want me to go there, fine I will do it. But on my own and without your lousy filthy…"

Murdoch cleared his throat slightly to announce his presence, but regretted it the same second. The woman now turned to him. Her face was enraged and flushed crimson. Two remarkably blue eyes behind a pair of plain glasses gave him a deadly glare. "And who the hell are you?"

"Officer William McMaster Murdoch, Miss", Murdoch answered hesitantly.

In an instant the woman fell silent. She examined him with obvious disgust as if he was some kind of insect, before she turned to the men before her again.

"You´re kidding right?" she snorted. "You cannot be serious".

"Of course we are, Miss Watson.", one of the men who Murdoch suspected to be police-officers, answered calmly.

Mr. Ismay shot him an apologetic smile while Captain Smith looked as if he was desperately trying to hold back a grin.

The woman, Miss Watson had that man called her, looked at him again with an evil eye. "No way. Look at him, he´s old, he´s ugly, he´s…he won´t…" In her rage she seemed to have lost her words.

Although he had absolutely no clue why that woman was insulting him, Murdoch tried to retain his composure:" I beg your pardon, Miss. But what exactly won´t I?"

"Become my fiancé of course!"

xxxxxx

_The cat is out of the bag now. Please read and review!_


	4. My lovely fiancée

Disclaimer: Business as usual!

_Thank you guys for your reviews._

_classicmovielover: Thank you for complementing my English. I loved English literature since I was at school and I thought it was worth a try to do my own story in English._

_To answer your questions:  
1. The story starts in December 1911. But Titanic had her launching first at April 2nd, 1912. So at the beginning of my story the world´s newest and finest ship is indeed the Olympic. The real Murdoch served on Olympic before coming onto the Titanic by the way._

_2. You are right. On the maiden voyage Murdoch served as First Officer and Lightoller as the Second. _

_But originally Murdoch was supposed to be Chief Officer, Lightoller First Officer and a certain David Blair should be Second Officer. They remained in their positions even during the sea trials at Belfast._

_But a last-minute-order from Captain Smith changed the Officer´s positions only few days before Titanics departure from Southampton._

_Captain Smith announced Henry T. Wilde (who was his Chief Officer on the Olympic before) as Titanics Chief Officer, because of his profound knowledge from his time on the Olympic._

_Due to that, Murdoch was bumped to First Officer, Lightoller to Second Officer and David Blair had to leave the crew completely. The other Officers remained the same._

_After reaching New York however, Murdoch should change to Chief Officer again and Wilde should return to the Olympic._

_To sum it up: At the time the story takes place so far, Murdoch still is the Chief Officer and Lights the First one. Nobody knew about the discharge at that time (most likely even the Captain and Wilde didn´t). _

_I hope I could answer your questions satisfactorily._

_Now on with the story!_

xxxxxx

"Become my fiancé of course."

The silence that followed her sentence was so deeply, that you could hear a pin drop. Murdoch stared open-mouthed and completely out of words at Miss Watson; Miss Watson stared fuming at Mr. Ismay; Mr. Ismay stared help-seeking to the police officers; the police officers stared embarrassed at each other and Captain Smith stared at the ceiling, probably to keep himself from burst out into laughing.

After a few more minutes of collective staring, Murdoch was the first one to regain just the right little bit of his composure to ask utterly shocked: "Pardon me?"

The woman turned on him again. "Pardon me, pardon me?" she aped him. "Since you are not looking THAT old to be deaf already, I think you heard me well enough. That impossible lot here", she nodded to the other men, "is suggesting that you and I should become engaged to each other."

The little bit of his composure left him instantly again. "And could you be so kind as to explain that a little bit further?"

Miss Watson snorted and stepped up to him. "Don´t look at me. Ask your little friends here, although it really is unnecessary. By no means will I give in to that ridiculous suggestion. And not on your nelly I will get nearer to you than in an arm's length. You´re old, you´re ugly, you are a man, you are dull and I certainly do not like you."

Murdoch felt the anger rise to his throat. He was not a man who would insult or treat a woman badly in any way, but this Miss Watson was clearly overstepping the lines. "And you are certainly a girl of extraordinary intelligence to know that in less than five minutes."

"I´m not a girl, Mister!"

"My apologies, Miss Watson. I think spoiled brat would indeed be more suitable." By now, they stared at each other with such anger, that their noses were almost touching. (Which was a peculiar thing to see, because Miss Watson was so short in height, that she just reached Murdoch´s shoulders).

Finally it was Captain Smith who stepped forward and gently took his Chief Officer by the shoulder.

"Calm down Mr. Murdoch", he said with a stern voice. Turning to the supposed-to-be police officers he added:

"Gentlemen, I suggest we will take young Mr. Murdoch here to somewhere more…peaceful and give him time to adjust himself. And I think an explanation is in order. I believe Mr. Ismay here can handle Miss Watson a few minutes alone."

Mr. Ismay cringed at Smiths last sentence, for he severely doubted he would be able to handle the little tomboy just for a second. Nevertheless he gave the Captain an affirmative nod.

"Can I offer you some home-made cookies, Miss? To ease the mood a little bit?" Ismay asked her.

"You can stick your bloody cookies up to your.." Smith closed the door quickly behind him.

Murdoch followed his Captain and the two still unknown men into another office onto the same floor. Once the door was closed, Murdoch turned thoroughly disgruntled to his three counterparts.

"I have just one question, gentlemen. What the hell is going on here?"

Captain Smith ushered him into one of the chairs. "Maybe it would be wiser to sit down a moment, Mr. Murdoch." He pointed at the two men who seemed to be rather embarrassed about the whole situation. "These are police officers Jackson and Hartley. They´ve come to us from their offices at Scotland Yard."

Murdoch looked rather puzzled. "Scotland Yard?" he questioned.

One of the men, Mr. Hartley, stepped forward. "Yes, Mr. Murdoch, Scotland Yard indeed. The situation that leads us here requests the utmost amount of discretion. So I must insist that nothing of our conversation will leave this room."

Murdoch nodded. "I shan´t tell a soul, Sir, I swear. But as you can imagine, I am rather desperate to hear what I have to do with you."

Mr. Hartley sighed. "Captain Smith and Mr. Ismay told me of your trustworthiness. And I will trust your word then, Mr. Murdoch. The woman you have just met is Miss Evelyn Jane Watson. And since last Friday night, she is the most precious witness to Scotland Yard and our counterparts in the United States of America. And because of that she is one of the most endangered people in the country at the moment."

Murdoch looked at him curiously. "May I ask what she witnessed, Sir?"

"You may, Mr. Murdoch. Truthfully you even have to ask. Our American comrades and we are searching for the members of a high-criminal syndicate for some time now. We are talking here about a large amount of contraband goods and dealing in illicit drugs. The Americans believe that the syndicates head is not only immensely wealthy but also an American citizen. They are suspecting a certain millionaire from Philadelphia to be behind it, but they have no real proof yet. I think you can understand that we are not informing you about names."

Will nodded slightly. Although Mr. Hartley´s story was a really captivating one, he still hadn´t no clue about his role in the game.

Mr. Hartley noticed and continued: "Since Friday night however, Evelyn Watson could give a new turn to the whole case. She was on her way home when she decided to take a short evening walk at the docks, which

led her to overhearing a very interesting and important conversation between two Americans and two British. She told us, that they were arguing about money and drugs and that one of the Americans was threatening the two British. It was then that she realized she was seeing a bunch of criminals.

In the end the American shot one of the British and told the other one to deliver "that message of the boss" to his superior and to remind him of the treatment awaiting him in case of another failure.

Understandably, Miss Watson made a quick attempt to run away instantly, but was spotted thereby by the two Americans. She owes her life to a mere lucky coincident but she is now in a grave danger. She is also requested to travel to America and bear testimony to the Police in the New York city and Philadelphia. That aggravates her situation further, of course. And that´s the point where you get into the game Mr. Murdoch."

Will still looked puzzled. "And of what assistance can I be to you and Miss Watson?" he asked, although he had a dreadful idea about the nature of Mr. Hartley´s answer.

"You should know that Miss Watson lives on her own and that she is an abnormally independent person. But she needs to be protected from now on. We cannot allow her to live alone no longer. And we also have to get her as discreetly to New York as possible. The men she has overheard are no doubt looking for her by now and they will certainly know that she might travel to America in the next months. The syndicate is aware that the police is searching for them. If she were to travel as a single woman, it will look too suspicious and we are certain, that the syndicate will search the passenger´s lists of the ships that go for America.

So we just had to invent a plan and we decided together with our counterparts in America that it would be best for her to attend to Titanic´s maiden voyage. The syndicate won´t hopefully anticipate her at such a great public event. But to be sure, we also decided that it would be wise to disguise her as one of the Officer´s fiancée."

Murdoch studied Mr. Hartley intently. "Truthfully, I see the benefits of the plan, Sir. But why me?"

Captain Smith, who had silently listened to Mr. Hartley´s explanations stepped in: "That was my fault actually, Mr. Murdoch. When Mr. Ismay informed me of Mr. Hartleys request, I was not to be a happy bunny about it. But after a while, Mr. Ismay and I came to the conclusion that we couldn´t decline it either.

Afterwards we started to think over who would be the right man to handle such a delicate and difficult task. And we both agreed that it could only be you."

"And why is that so, Sir?" Murdoch asked hesitantly.

"Quite simple, Mr. Murdoch. Officers Moody and Lowe were totally out of the question. Boxhall, Pitman and Lightoller are married and Mr. Blair is engaged. That left you the only one suitable. We also agreed, that you are man enough to handle the situation as well as Miss Watson who happens to be a very….fiery character as you have seen." "And heard" Murdoch added.

Mr. Hartley spoke again:" Mr. Ismay and Captain Smith informed us about you and we also found you the best choice. You are a bachelor, you have your own house so that Miss Watson can live with you until attending the maiden voyage and we look forward that you are able to watch over her and protect her if necessary. So we are asking you for consent."

Murdoch looked at the floor for a while, his thoughts rambling. This officer (and both of his direct superiors) were suspecting him to play nursemaid to a woman he didn´t even know and who behaved like a madman towards him. No, not playing nursemaid but rather to live with her, pretending to be engaged to her, hell even pretending to be in love with her.

"Sirs, I have to thank you for finding me worthy of your trust. But I think I cannot help you here. Just look the way she behaved when she saw me. I think it is impossible for me to make anyone believe that Miss Watson and I share at least a positive feeling to each other. And love is totally out of question I believe."

Mr. Hartley sighed. "Mr. Murdoch, I can understand you entirely. But I would not have asked you if the situation wouldn´t be as desperate as it is. Please excuse Miss Watsons manners, but she is a mere girl with her nineteen years and she does not understand the full consequences of her situation. Don´t look so scandalized", he added quickly when he spotted Murdoch´s stare. "I am aware of your age-difference but I won´t think anyone would wonder about it. Miss Watson is in a life-threatening danger Mr. Murdoch. We cannot protect her properly, because if we tried, it would draw the syndicates´ attention towards her. Our only advantage is their lack of knowledge about her."

Captain Smith laid a supportive hand on Murdochs shoulder. "I think we should give Mr. Murdoch here a little time to consider this situation. You should grant him at least a few days to make up his mind, gentlemen."

"No" came a soft reply. The Captain looked down at his officer. "No, Mr. Murdoch?"

"You heard me right, Sir. That whole situation is troubling me, embarrassing me and I dislike it with every fiber...but…I fear that I just cannot say now. You know…I´m involved now. I couldn´t stand the thought of something happening to Miss Watson. I certainly do not want to be responsible for her death or something.", Murdoch explained.

Straightening his jaw he got up from his chair. "Sirs, I promise to do everything to assure Miss Watsons safety, although I cannot imagine that SHE will approve of our agreement."

Captain Smith shot Mr. Hartley a rather proud smile. "See Mr. Hartley, I told you that my men are the finest."

He turned to Will: "Mr. Murdoch, be sure that you have my outmost respect for your decision. But truthfully I didn´t expect any less of you. Let us just go and convince the young lady now." Murdoch just nodded before he followed the three other men back to Mr. Ismay´s office.

Miss Watson wasn´t shouting anymore. Instead she had limited her actions to a constant evil glare towards a definitely distressed Mr. Ismay. The latter sighed in relief when he heard the footsteps announcing the return of the other men. And he saw Miss Watson stiffen up again.

Outside the door Murdoch motioned for the group to stop. "Sirs, I think you should leave talking to Miss Watson to me. At least I am the one she has to cope with, not one of you."

The other men shot him an admiring look before Captain Smith nodded satisfied. "Very well, Mr. Murdoch. Do as you want."

Murdoch took a deep breath and opened the door. Immediately, Miss Watson jumped to her feet, obviously eager to vent her wrath on him again, but Murdoch was faster this time. "Miss Watson." At his demanding voice the young woman stayed silent for a moment. "Would you please be so kind as to follow me outside? I think we should be discussing our situation in private."

Before she could object, he stepped behind her, laid his right hand gently between her shoulder blades and shoved her with gentle force outside to the floor.

He closed the door and released her immediately, only to find her glaring at him again. She crossed her arms before her breasts and turned away from him. "I don't see a reason why I should talk to you, Mr. Murdoch."

"Miss Watson…we both know why."

His quite voice with the slight Scottish accent calmed her enough to turn to him again. "Fine", she huffed. "Fine. Then talk."

"Listen Miss. Mr. Hartley informed me about your … adventure at the docks and he made me aware that you are in a highly dangerous situation at the moment."

Miss Watson snorted. "Maybe I am, but I can handle that perfectly wonderful on my own. I don´t need anybody to lock me away somewhere."

"Mr. Hartley is of another opinion and I think I agree with him. And by the way, nobody wants to lock you away. Miss Watson, I offer you my help and my protection. You can stay with me in my house from now until April and I will play your fiancé for those months. I also promise to do my best to get you safe and sound to New York. And don´t worry, I won´t take advantage of you or something."

"Of course not, Mr. Murdoch", she replied sarcastically. "Who wouldn´t believe in a sailor´s promise not to take advantage of a woman."

Will crossed his arms before his chest. "I am an Officer of the White Star Line, Miss and I give you my word that no harm will befall you from my side. Besides, you are in no way the type of woman I would be interested in." He couldn´t help that last sentence.

Miss Watson seemed unabashed. "Am I too intelligent or too unyielding?"

"Too plain, Miss Watson. Too plain. Anyway, I am not here to discuss your complete lack of physical attractiveness, but to offer my help to you. And listen. I am offering it just this one time. You can choose to accept it or you can just turn and go away. But then you won´t get another chance."

Miss Watsons demeanor seemed to change from feeling deeply insulted to somewhat intimidated by his stern behavior. Her gaze fell to the carpet and she seemed to consider his words.

When he noticed her chewing on her lips, it was the first time for Murdoch to realize, how young she really looked and how small. Her insulting and shouting was clearly just an attempt to cover her insecurity.

"Well?" he asked softly after granting her a few moments of thinking.

She looked up at him again and held his gaze through her glasses before frowning again.

"I haven´t got an alternative anyway, haven´t I?"

"I don´t think so, Miss. Same for me."

"But I don´t like you."

"You are no person I would voluntarily befriend either, Miss Watson."

She narrowed her eyes again and was about to reply something undoubtedly unfriendly, but Murdoch stopped her again. "Miss Watson. I am waiting."

He could see her clenching her small fists and gritting her teeth.

Again she looked up at him before she answered him quietly. "Fine. I will accept. But do not expect me to follow your orders or succumb to you."

His slight chuckle unnerved her. "I wouldn´t have thought elsewise, Miss Watson." He grabbed inside his jacket to produce a pocket watch. "Miss Watson, I shall leave you now, because I have to work at least a few hours today. And I suggest that you are escorted home be Mr. Hartley and Mr. Jackson to pack your things. I will pick you up at seven o´clock tonight. "

"I can find your place alone, Mr. Murdoch. I do not need your help."

" I am sure of that, Miss Watson. But I have promised to protect you. Let´s not argue again for now. Just be ready at seven, alright? Where do you live?"

He looked down when she nodded her head hesitantly before answering: "At Ashwood Garden no. 16. I inherit the little apartment in the attic."

"Very well. Please enlighten these gentlemen behind the door about our conversation. I feel an urgent need for some fresh air right now."

And before Evelyn Watson could grumble about his last comment, she saw him turn on his heels and watched his uniform-clad backside disappearing.

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_I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Please leave a review._


	5. No trouble at all

_Disclaimer: You know already_

_Thank you very much for your kind reviews, especially for encouraging me about my English. Sometimes it is rather difficult for me to find the right word order or grammar. My native language is German and it is SO very different from English! But I promise to do my best!_

_A last comment before I continue with the story: You cannot believe how frustrating the chapters are at the moment. I have so many ideas for later chapters and I am so bloody desperate to write them down. On the other hand I do not want to rush on with the story too quickly (character development etc.). So at the moment I really have to contain myself. I hope you guys will support me for a while._

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"Will!"

"….."

"Will!"

"…"

"WILLIAM MURDOCH!"

"WHAT?"

"Stop. That. pacing!"Charles Lightoller grabbed his friend by the shoulders. "What the hell has Ismay done to you?" Will didn´t answer. Again. Lights had never seen his best friend in such a disheveled state of mind. William Murdoch, the epitome of calm and control, had arrived an hour ago in an alarming state of shock. Lightoller had tried everything to worm some explanation out of his friend but that had turned out to be an impossible task.

The only thing Will had done after entering their shared office was pacing. Up and down, up and down. Sometimes he would stop, shake his head or mumble some incoherent words, only to start pacing all over again.

Murdoch stared at him, as Lights started to shake him slightly. "Blimey Will! What has happened in that bloody meeting?"

No response.

"WILL!"

"Nothing." Lights stared at him unbelievably. "Pardon me?"

"I said nothing. Nothing happened. What a nice weather outside."

Lights took a deep breath. "William Murdoch! If you do not tell your best friend what is troubling you in the next three minutes, I will throw you into the wet dock. Did Ismay drug you or something?"

Murdoch shook his head. "I cannot tell you."

Silence.

"Are you kidding me?"

"Certainly not."

"You wish for a cold bath then?"

Murdoch struggled out of Lightollers steely grip. "Of course he didn´t drug me, Lights." He sighed. He knew it was ridiculous trying to keep the newest turn of events from his best friend. Lightoller would get to know his new life situation sooner or later anyway.

"I am waiting, William!"

"As I told you, Lights. Ismay did not drug me. He did worse." By now Lights was beyond concerned. "Worse?"

"Yes, definitely worse." Will took a deep breath. "He got me a fiancée."

Lightoller stared at him openmouthed. "Say that again!"

Murdoch started to tear at his hair. "A fiancée Lights. A woman, girl whatever you want to call it. And I agreed. I cannot believe that I truly agreed."

Lightoller pulled out his office chair. "Sit down." Murdoch obeyed like child. Lights crouched before him. "Will…why do you believe that Ismay got you a fiancée?" he asked carefully. It was obvious that Lights still believed in his "Ismay-got-Murdoch-drugged-theory".

"I don´t believe it Lights, it is like I said. I am quasi engaged now."

"Explain yourself?"

Murdoch took a deep breath. "It´s complicated." "I´m sure it is. Nevertheless…I am listening."

Slowly Murdoch started to tell his story. He told about Hartley and Jackson, about Evelyns fateful walk at the docks and about the policemen´s request. The more he talked, the more he felt a weight lifting from his heart. The only thing he was hesitant to tell about was his fiancée in person.

Lightollers eyes were wide as pumpkins when Will stopped his talking.  
"So you are going to play fiancé to a woman you do not even know, because Scotland Yard needs her to be protected from some bunch of criminals?"

"That sums it up, I think." Lightoller watched him for a moment before he gave his friend a mischievous grin. "Sounds like fun."

Murdoch looked at him as if he were a madman. "Sounds like fun? Are you nuts, Lights?"

"A little…but that´s why everyone is in love with me, isn´t it?"

Murdoch snorted. "Oh yes, very much in love. It´s always good to see, that your supposed-to-be best friend is taking your trouble so seriously." Lights patted his shoulder. "But I AM taking you serious. I just don´t see any trouble at all."

By now, Murdoch was beside himself with rage. "I know about your constant addiction to mischief Lights, but now you are overstepping a line. I AM in a definitely troublesome, embarrassing and awkward situation and I had hoped that I had a least one small bit of aid from my best friend. Thank you for nothing and good bye." Murdoch was about to stomp out of his bureau, when Lights grabbed him by the shoulders.

"My Will, wait! I didn´t mean to insult you. Of course, I DO understand that you are feeling uncomfortable…but on the other hand…there could be some benefits, I think."

"Benefits?" Murdoch looked at him as if his best friend was some kind of lunatic. "I keep asking myself slowly but surely if maybe YOU have been drugged this morning."

"Will, Will, Will…", Lightoller shook his head. "You just need a little push in the right direction. I think – and by the way Sylvia and the old bat that is your neighbor do agree with me – that it is beyond time you found someone special in your life. You haven´t courted a woman again since that bloody Ada dumped you four years ago. And slowly but surely you are getting older. Maybe this is the opportunity you have waited for."

Murdoch stared at him broodingly. "Don´t be ridiculous, Lights. Firstly, I am not in search of a wife. Secondly, I hardly doubt that a nineteen year old would be suitable. And thirdly I cannot believe that I am discussing this with you in earnest. My task is to protect her. I doubt that courting and taking advantage of her are included."

Lightollers eyes shined like those of a little boy in front of the Christmas tree. "Nineteen? Blimey Will, don´t tell Sylvia but you surely are a lucky son of a bitch…How does she look like by the way? Is she pretty?"

Murdoch shrugged. "I don´t really know to be honest. I didn´t look at her especially close", he told, but when he saw Lightollers unbelieving face he added: "But she´s rather plain from what I recall. Not ugly but not pretty either. She´s rather small and slightly build, she has dark hair and she wears glasses. And ", he flared his nostrils at the memory, "she is rude, impolite, improper and she shouts and swears all the time. She called me dull, ugly and old without even knowing me. So, whatever you have in mind Charles it won´t happen. She is definitely no type of woman I would ever be interested in."

Lightoller chuckled. "I will remind you of that when the time comes, Will. Nevertheless, your little fiancée seems to be an interesting person."

Before Murdoch could make any reply, the telephone on his desk rang. Will straightened and slowed his breathing before picking up the phone. "Yes?"

"Mr. Murdoch, is that you?"

"Positive, sir."

"James Hartley speaking. I would like to meet you in an hour at your house, Mr. Murdoch, to discuss the minutiae of your…engagement and also to deliver most of Miss Watson's belongings. The lady has quite an amount of books and I believe you would not be fond of carrying them alone."

Murdoch rolled his eyes. "If you insist, sir. But may I remind you that I have a job to attend to?"

"Yes, Mr. Murdoch, I insist. And don´t worry about working for today. Mr. Ismay has given you the day off, of course. So can I count on meeting you in an hour?"

"Don´t worry Sir. I will be there."

"Very well, Mr. Murdoch. I see you then."

Murdoch rang off angrily and noticed the expectant look Lightoller gave him. "I am deeply sorry Lights, but it seems as if I have to leave you now. I´m going home."

"Home? Now? And what about working?"

Murdoch patted his shoulder. "I´ve been given the day off. And I am sure that you can handle my tasks as well perfectly fine for today." Lights just gave him a nasty face.

At the same time, Evelyn Jane Watson sat on her sofa in the middle of her living room and just kept

staring at the wall. What had she gotten herself into now? Why on earth had she had to take a walk on that bloody evening? Why hadn´t she just gone home? Why of all people was it always her to get herself into serious trouble?

Every time she thought her life would calm down for a while, a new annoyance came around the corner.

The memories of that fateful evening still sent shivers down her spine. The gunshot, the facial expression of the man the moment he lost his life, his blood on the floor. Evelyn closed her eyes, desperate to calm her breathing. Her escape had been so damn close. She knew they would have killed her immediately if they had found her. And now? Were they searching for her? Certainly. Mr. Jackson and Mr. Hartley were sure about it. Could they find her? Would they truly recognize her? She didn´t know how well they had seen her in the dim light. She looked at her shaking hands. She was afraid; no way could she deny that.

Evelyn ran her hand over her face and noticed the slight sheen of sweat that had built on her upper lip. As if she hadn´t been punished enough with her life-threatening situation. No, the police – actually she had hoped they would protect and help her – had done the only thing to make her life even more miserable. An engagement…a fiancé…a man… and she had to live with him. Quickly she grabbed one of the sofa pillows and buried her head inside to muffle her frustrated cry.

Angry with herself she threw the pillow to the ground and hurried to the bathroom. She needed to freshen up. Putting her glasses onto the sink, she splashed some cold water into her face.

Slowly she looked up into the mirror and observed her own reflection.

"_I am not here to discuss your complete lack of physical attractiveness."_

She remembered his embarrassing words and wondered if they were true. Actually there had never been someone who attempted to court her and she was glad about it. She had never made a secret about her attitude towards marriage. But she had never thought herself to be ugly. Not overly pretty perhaps, but completely lacking of physical attractiveness? To hell with that man.

Critically she gazed at her features. Her long, soft brown curls were tied up in a messy bun high on her head. Some water drops were rolling down her small, somewhat stubby nose, sprinkled with freckles. The only thing she really liked about her face, were her eyes. "_You have exactly your mothers eyes, Evelyn",_ her father had always told her and she happily believed him. She knew her eye color was somewhat peculiar, a strange mixture between blue and green, almost turquoise in a bright light.

"No need to feel insecure, Ev", she thought to herself. With a grim expression she put her glasses back on.

Still staring into the mirror, her thoughts kept on rambling. She had never known her mother for she had died while giving birth to her daughter, leaving her father as a broken man.

He had tried to live on for his daughter, but one day after twelve years, he had surrendered to his grief. Evelyn forced herself not to think about the day she had found him hanging from the ceiling in their living room.

Since that day she had learned how to survive and how to be independent. Her aunt had granted her the chance to attend to a good boarding school, where Evelyn had enjoyed a splendid education.

And now, at the age of nineteen she had finally gotten the job she had always dreamed about. She had been hired as the new junior librarian at Southampton library. Truthfully, it was impossible fot a librarian to achieve riches, but she couldn´t care less about that. She could afford her small apartment and had enough to live a decent life. Everything had been so perfect.

And now, her whole life was shattered once again.

She had never wanted a man in her life for she utterly detested the thought of marriage and becoming dependent on someone. Evelyn had witnessed how her schoolmates were just raised and educated to become mindless appendages to some far too old husbands. Some of them were literally sold for a good dower.

Evelyn had sworn to herself that she would by no means give into a fate like this.

And now she had fallen into a nightmare. William Murdoch was the epitome of everything she detested about men. He was old, stiff and he clearly had tried to domineer over her. And for god's sake, she had surrendered. She had to admit that he had a natural given authority in his behavior and that she had been somewhat intimidated by him. Evelyn clenched her fists. She would not succumb to him.

"It´s just for a few weeks", she tried to reassure yourself. "Just a few weeks."

But why did she feel as if she was sent into prison?

Slowly she made her way back to her living room. There was no use dwelling in self-pity. Sighing she started to pack her books and other belongings into the various boxes that Mr. Jackson had brought earlier.

She would just have to make the best of her situation.

I´m deeply sorry, that this chapter took me so long to finish. But I had an extremely busy week and I suffered from a mild writer´s block. I know that it is not the best chapter I have ever written but I´m just glad that I have finished it. Hope you like it anyway. I mainly wanted to introduce Evelyn properly. Please let me know what you think about her.


	6. Welcome to hell

_Disclaimer: Still the same_

_Thanks again to all those who have reviewed. I hope you are enjoying the story so far!_

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Evelyn sat on her sofa and just listened to the constant tick-tack of her wall clock. It was a quarter to seven and time was passing by agonizing slowly. Evelyn looked around her now nearly empty apartment. All of her movable stuff like clothes, personal things and her precious books had already been transferred to William Murdoch´s home. Her furniture however, was to be left here due to the fact that she would return in late April or May. The older gentleman who hired the flat out had not questioned farther about the reason for her absence as long as he was given his monthly rent. Mr. Hartley had promised her to do so. The policeman knew, that giving her the opportunity of returning to her old life, did a great deal to calm Evelyn down.

The clock showed that there were still a few minutes left until seven o´clock. Evelyn nervously wrung a sofa-pillow between her hands. She was certain that Murdoch would arrive precisely on time. What would await her with him? How would it be to actually live with him? Would he treat her rude or was he even abusive? No… Although he had presented himself as stiff, proper and a bit too authoritarian for her taste, he seemed to be not the type of man who would hurt a woman. If he were, Hartley and Jackson certainly wouldn´t have picked him as her guardian.

She also asked herself about his home. It was probably as cold and immaculate as his owner. Would she be given a room for her own? Nobody could expect her to share a bedroom with him, right? The mere thought made her sick.

It would be the first time to actually share a household with somebody since her father had died seven years ago, Evelyn mused. After becoming an orphan, she left her home to live among many other girls in a boarding school, staying there even for the holidays. Straight after school, she had gained her employ as a librarian in Southampton due to her brilliant marks and had moved to her own little place. She felt a sudden pang in her heart when she thought of her job. She loved books and literature since she could ever remember (a fact she had in common with her mother as her father had always told her) and for the longest time she had nourished the wish of becoming a librarian. She couldn´t imagine anything more fulfilling then to spend her days surrounded by books. And now she had to discharge her precious job due to her miserable situation. Firstly, it was too dangerous for her to be in public for hours and secondly it wouldn´t be appropriate for a soon-to-be-wife to work. She knew people would start to talk anyway about her living with a man before being married to him. No need to enhance the gossip any further. Nevertheless, it had nearly broken her heart when she had to tell the Chief-librarian that she wanted to quit her employ. The old man, who treated her nearly as a family-member, had been deeply saddened and told her that she could always return if she wanted. She hoped this promise would still stand when the time came.

A gentle knock on the door immediately stopped her rambling thoughts and made her stiffen up. Evelyn felt her hands become sweaty from her nervousness and she scolded herself mentally for being so insecure. Taking a deep, steadying breath, she got up, smoothed out her navy-blue skirt and went to answer the door.

"Good evening, Mr. Murdoch", she greeted him in a plain tone, eager to hide her inner turmoil. Murdoch tipped his head. "Good evening to you, Miss Watson. You are ready to leave, I suppose?"

"Bossy as always, Mr. Murdoch? What if I told you that I am not ready?"

Murdoch looked at her annoyed. "And you Miss Watson? Being impolite as always? If you still have something to attend to, feel free to take your time. We are not in a hurry."

Evelyn glared back at him. "Don´t worry Mr. Murdoch. I have finished packing. But nevertheless I do not feel ready to bear you."

"In that case, Miss Watson, I can assure you that I share your feelings. Maybe behaving polite would do a great deal to ease the tension."

Evelyn snorted before looking at him from head to toe. "Are you wearing that uniform even when you are asleep, Mr. Murdoch?"

Murdoch shot her a mocking grin. "That, my darling fiancée, you´ll have to find out on your own." Her scandalized expression was priceless. Quickly he added: "I am only kidding, Miss Watson. I just thought that an official task called for official attire." That was partly true, he had to admit. He felt more courageous in his uniform and meeting her again definitely needed a lot of courage.

"So I am an official task?", Evelyn asked somewhat insulted. He crosses his arms and lifted one of his eyebrows. "I think it is…or would you rather think of it as a personal one?"

Evelyn gritted her teeth. "Definitely not." Fuming she went to fetch her coat, shawl and gloves.

"You should dress warmly", Murdoch advised. "It is rather freezing outside."

"Bless god that I have you around, Mr. Murdoch. I earnestly didn´t expect cold weather in December. The narrowness of my female mind denies me deductive reasoning", she replied sarcastically whilst buttoning up her coat.

Murdoch rolled his eyes and watched her wrapping her shawl around her neck and slipping on her gloves. She looked up at him through her glasses. "Ready?"

"Ready when you are", he retorted and stepped out of her flat. Evelyn slowly closed the behind her, desperate to ignore the nagging feeling of never coming back again.

Murdoch descended the stairs with Evelyn right on his heels. Inwardly he felt somewhat sorry for she had to leave her home. That feeling however, didn´t last long. As they stepped out together on the street, he looked down at her and extended his arm. "Shall we, then?"

Evelyn stared at his arm. "We shall, Mr. Murdoch, but I am able to walk perfectly fine without your help." With that, she started to walk fast away from him.

Murdoch caught up to her. "You know that we are supposed to act like a couple when we are in public? Besides, I am just trying to treat you with respect. And by the way…my home lies in the other direction."

He noticed her blushing, but he couldn´t tell if it was due to the cold or to embarrassment.

"Maybe you should take the lead then, Mr. Murdoch. Furthermore, I think our little charade can at least wait until tomorrow. And about being polite: I know that you don´t like me and you know that I don´t like you. So politeness seems to be dispensable, doesn´t it?"

"You do not need to like a person to be polite towards her. And personally, I don´t know if I like you or not. I just do not appreciate your behavior towards me."

They were walking side by side now and Evelyn stayed silent. She was tired of arguing with him right now. The whole day had been extremely exhausting to both body and mind. Murdoch had been right about the temperature, though. It was freezing and Evelyn started to shiver from the cold and her weariness.

Murdoch got aware of her misery when he heard her chattering of teeth. He looked down to her again. In the dim light of the street lamps he could see how pale her face was and how tired her eyes looked. He suddenly felt bad about harassing her earlier.

"Are you cold?" he asked carefully.

Evelyn just nodded. He sighed. To her surprise, he grabbed her arm and tucked it securely under his own, pulling her closer to him in the process. "Don´t fight this time, lassie. I mean no harm, I just can´t stand seeing you freeze."

Evelyn locked eyes with him and nodded slightly. "Thank you."

He actually smiled at her. "You are welcome."

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By the time they reached his house, Evelyn was feeling slightly better. The walk had fought away a little bit of her weariness and – although she hated to admit – she had warmed up due to his body heat. Murdoch released her arm to unlock the door. Stepping inside, he lit a lamp and shut the door behind her. "Welcome to my home, Miss Watson. I hope that although you do not like me in person you will at least like my place and feel comfortable."

"We will see", Evelyn mumbled and curiously glanced at her surroundings. From what she could see now, she was positively surprised. His home looked rather neat and cozy. She watched him unbutton his greatcoat and putting it together with his leather gloves properly to the coat rack, before taking off his officers hat. It was the first time for Evelyn to see him without it. Underneath he had thick, light brown hair which was cut short at his sides and slightly longer on top.

Murdoch turned to her. "Would you please give me your coat? Or do you need help taking it off?"

Evelyn frowned again. "I am a big girl, Mr. Murdoch. I can dress and undress myself." With that she shrugged of her coat, her shawl and gloves and handed it over to him. Shaking his head he also hung it up on the coat rack. He watched Evelyn as she started to observe her surroundings and explained: "Behind that door on the left, you´ll find the kitchen. On the right side lies the living room from where you can step out into the garden. Upstairs is my bedroom, the bathroom, my home-office and your room, of course. Would you like me to show you to your room first or do want to inspect the house?"

"I´d prefer to see my room, please. I´m rather tired. The house-tour can wait until tomorrow, can´t it?"

Murdoch shrugged. "If you wish, but I am going to show you the bathroom at least. You probably need to use it." Evelyn nodded and followed him upstairs. She had to admit, that his home suited her. All the walls were painted white which gave a nice contrast to the dark brown timber floor boards. She spotted a lot of photographs on the walls but had no time to give them a further look.

They reached the first floor with two doors on the left and two on the right.

He pointed to the first door on the right. "This is my home-office. The second door on the right side leads to the bathroom." He pointed to the left side. "The first door leads to my bedroom. And now I shall show you where you are going to reside".

He opened the second door on the left, switched on the light and led her inside.

Evelyn looked in awe at her surroundings. That room was simply awesome. The walls in here were white as well. On the right side she found a rather large white cupboard, beautifully decorated with carved flowers. On the left side stood a wooden bed which looked extremely cozy and right beside the window were a small white desk and a matching chair. But the highlight of the room was the wide oriel.

She turned to Murdoch. "It´s beautiful" she told him quietly. Murdoch smiled at her loss for words. "Yes it is. It was once supposed to become a nursery but I actually use it as the guest room. It´s yours for the time of your attendance."

Evelyn noticed the slight hurt in his voice when he mentioned the word nursery, but she decided not ask him further about it. He had already brought her suitcases and bags up here, but her books were amiss. "Mr. Murdoch?"

"Hmmm?"

"I cannot see the boxes containing my books."

"Oh the books. I brought them to my office actually. I am using that room more as a little library than as an office and I thought we could add your books in there."

Evelyn nodded and yawned heartily. "Mr. Murdoch, I would like to retire now. So could you please leave me alone?"

"Of course, Miss Watson." Glad, that they hadn´t argued for the last hour, he slowly made his way to the door, but was stopped by her voice again. "Mr. Murdoch, I nearly forgot to ask you about the key."

"Key?" he looked at her bluntly. "Which key?"

"The key to that room, of course." Murdoch looked at her questioningly. "Why do want to have it?"

Evelyn raised an eyebrow and took a deep breath: "It´s simple, Mr. Murdoch. I am not going to sleep here for a minute knowing that you could come in any time and molest me during the night."

Murdoch was about to make an indignant reply, but he kept it. He knew it was fruitless to convince her that his intentions to her were thoroughly honorable. He just shook his head in defeat. "If you wish, Miss Watson, do as you want. The key is in the right drawer of the desk."

Without wishing her a good night, he left the room and shut the door behind him. That woman, no girl, drove him nuts. Sighing, he went to his own room and lay down on his bed, still fully clothed. A sleepless night was awaiting him. Of that he was pretty sure.


	7. A dish to remember

Disclaimer: The same as last time!

XxxxxxxxX

The jolly chirping of some early birds woke Evelyn up. With pleasure, she stretched her limbs and yawned heartily. She couldn´t remember the last time she had slept so utterly well. No dreams had disturbed her slumber and she felt totally relaxed. Closing her eyes again, she nuzzled her cozy pillow and took a deep breath, reveling in the appeasing scent of fresh soap…

Wait. Her laundry smelled of lavender! Her eyes flew open and she sat up abruptly, trying to find out her surroundings. That wasn´t her room. Evelyn started to panic when the memory hit her. Of course, she was in William Murdoch´s house. Letting out the breath she had been holding, she fell back onto the pillow. Her slumber had been so deep and surprisingly peaceful that she had forgotten about her current residence.

Leaning out to the bedside table, she quickly switched on the small lamp and looked at her alarm clock. It showed half past five. Contemplating whether she should grant herself a few more minutes of sleep or to get up already, she decided for the latter. Surely, Murdoch would be still asleep, which presented her with the opportunity to take a nice, unhurriedly bath.

Evelyn stretched again and got out of bed. The coldness of the room hit her and she rubbed her arms to warm up, getting even more desperate for the sanctuary of a hot bath. She rummaged through one of her suitcases and produced her bathrobe together with her toilet requisites. Carefully to not make any noise, she unlocked her door and quickly looked up and down the corridor. Murdoch could not be seen and no light was coming from one of the rooms. Splendid! Silently she tiptoed past his door and slipped into the bathroom. It was nice and clean, with a sink, a toilet and a rather large bathtub. On a small cupboard lay a bunch of fresh towels with a tiny slip of paper on it. Smiling she looked at the only word written on it: _"Evelyn"._ Maybe this William Murdoch would turn out to be more bearable than she had thought.

Unknown to Evelyn, said Mr. William Murdoch had already woken up himself. He groaned and pressed his pillow to his head. He had endured the second sleepless night and he had a splitting headache again. A lack of sleep really unnerved him. He needed his seven or eight hours to feel well during the day.

Moaning he rolled onto his stomach and buried his face into the mattress. His muscles felt stiff and sore for he had lain too long in an awkward position. Evelyn Jane Watson literally wore him down. Normally he was famous for his calm nature and his iron-like nerves, but that girl really tested his patience. He wasn´t sure if he could survive her until April (or if SHE could him), so maybe he should make his will to be on the safe side.

A sideway glance to his clock told him the time. WAY too early for his taste. He rolled back onto his backside. What to do? Getting up and taking a bath seemed the most optimal alternative, so reluctantly Murdoch got up. Bloody hell, that headache was killing him. At least he wouldn´t be in a hurry today. He could enjoy a bath, then prepare a good Scottish breakfast and wake Miss Watson. And maybe she would join him in a cup of coffee and some scrambled eggs. With that resolution, he got up, stretched his arms and headed for the bathroom.

Unfortunately, Murdoch was still rather dozy and inattentive and so he didn´t notice the faint gleam of light that shone from under the bathroom-door. Deep in his thoughts and not paying attention he opened the door and tried to step in, when a bloodcurdling shriek ripped him ruggedly off his dreamy state.

"GET OUT YOU PERVERT!" Before Murdoch even understood what was going on, something very hard and very wet hit his already hurting head and made him stumble out of the room again. _"Sweet Lord..." _

"Miss Watson", he knocked onto the door "Miss Watson, I am truly sorry. I didn´t notice you were in there…"

"Shut up! I knew you would try something like that you…you…you sex fiend!"

"Miss Watson please, I apologize. It really was just a stupid coincidence. I´m sorry, I didn´t mean to…!"

"Oh of course you didn´t! You know what Mr? Try to get in here again and I´ll throw worse at you than just a bath brush!"

Murdoch looked at his feet. She had in earnest hit him with a bath brush. "Listen Miss, I am really sorry. I honestly didn´t mean to walk in on you. Please let us talk later."

Before she could yell at him again, he quickly slid back into his room and shut the door. _"Great Will….well done, bloke. So much for trying to befriend her."_ Groaning he sat down on his bed and cradled his head in his hand. He gently touched the spot where she had hit him and flinched. A throbbing bump was swelling at his temple and the pain in his head was killing him now. He buried his face in his hands. At least he was fully awake now.

Evelyn was fuming. How dare he? Murdoch was exactly the old pervert she had suspected him to be. But he would get his nasty surprise. She would pay him back. Enraged, she fastened her robe around her body and stomped out of the bath towards her bedroom and slammed the door shut as loud as she could.

"THAT DOOR HAS A HANDLE!"

Evelyn smirked. Good to know that he didn´t like slamming. "I DON`T CARE!"

Exhausted, Murdoch finally stumbled into the bathroom and was greeted with an overwhelming scent of sweet mandarins. Evelyn must have used it in her bath and indeed he spotted a little bottle of scented oil on the cupboard. He groaned. Although it really smelled delicious, the sweet scent aggravated his soaring headache. "_Good Lord, what have I done to deserve this?"_

Murdoch sighed somewhat relieved when he slid into his bath and pressed a cloth with cold water onto his head. He definitely needed to make his will. There was NO way he could survive his engagement.

An hour later, Murdoch walked down to his kitchen. Except his jacket, he was fully clothed and he was desperate to have at least a good cup of strong coffee. To his surprise, Miss Watson was already seated on the table reading a newspaper and was enjoying a cup of English tea. She frowned when he entered the kitchen but didn´t anything further to show that she had acknowledged his presence. Murdoch cleared his throat uncomfortably. "Hello Miss Watson." She still ignored him.

Rolling his eyes, Murdoch sat down across from her and took the paper. "Miss Watson!"

Evelyn glared at him dangerously. "You are impossible. I don´t think that you are in the position to boss me around at the moment. Or have I have to remind you that you tried to molest me a mere hour ago?"

Murdoch rolled his eyes again. "Miss Watson…You know fully well that I didn´t mean any harm to you in the bathroom. As I told you already, I just didn´t notice you were in there. And I HAVE apologized several times by now. So one last time: I AM SORRY! And to calm you down: I didn´t see anything of you."

"Believe me…If you had I would have killed you by now."

Murdoch took a breath. "I won´t let you make a fool out of me. I do apologize again and that´s it. It was no harm done and it definitely won´t happen again. So stop your fussing now!"

Evelyn snorted but kept silent and grabbed her newspaper again. Murdoch rose and rummaged through the store cupboard in order to get something to eat. "Would you like breakfast?" he asked Evelyn. "No!" Murdoch shook his head. Still so young and already as stubborn as a donkey. Honestly, he wasn´t very hungry himself and he had noticed that he really needed to make some errands today.

Mumbling on a sheet of old bread he sat down again. "We have to buy food today", he told Evelyn. "Maybe you could join me therefore after work tonight?"

To his surprise, that comment seemed to excite her. "I could do it during the day!" she answered eagerly. That was her chance to get out of the house for a couple of time.

Murdoch eyed her worriedly. "Normally I wouldn´t mind, but do you think it is wise for you to wander around alone?"

"Oh come on, Mr. Murdoch. It´s just a quick walk to the market. There are plenty of people there. I don´t think that something could happen to me in such a crowded place."

Murdoch thought about it for a moment. To accompany her would make him feel better, but he also knew he owed her a favor after the bath-incident. He looked at her again. "Very well, Miss Watson. But promise me to be careful. We can write a list together and I leave you enough money here."

Evelyn looked at him insulted. "I can pay myself, Mr. Murdoch. At least for my half of the stuff. I don´t need your pity."

"No way I´m letting you pay for anything while you stay here. Miss Watson, although we had not the best start with each other, you are nevertheless a guest in my house."

Evelyn looked as if to make another indignant reply, but Murdoch quickly silenced her with a stern glare. "I won´t hear any of it, Evelyn", he demanded, not even noticing that he had used her first name, "I do know that you are capable of caring for yourself, but it would be wiser for you to save your money. After all, you can´t be sure about your future. Let me help you, alright?"

"But.."

"No buts, Evelyn. Just accept my offer. And don´t worry. I am paid handsomely enough to support a whole family without difficulty. Money is really no problem."

Evelyn contemplated his words. He was right, she would be glad if she could save the little money she owned. Maybe she could repay him in another way…

"Mr. Murdoch…I thank you for your offer and I will accept it…but just on one condition."

"And what would that be, Miss Watson?"

"You let me take care of the house. I could wash and clean and cook and those stuff. I would be much more comfortable if you´d let me do this to return the favor."

Murdoch glanced at her curious. "If you´d like Miss Watson, I am not the one to complain. But…to be honest, I wouldn´t have expected you to be the, well, homely type of woman…"

In an instant, Evelyn shot him an evil eye again: "Do you think I cannot run a household? I am very capable of doing so, sir."

"Even cooking?"

"You are truly a git. Is insulting me your newest hobby? Just because I am no brainless doll, you think I am not able to serve you a proper dish? You know what, Mr. Murdoch? You are a pervert, sexist and misogynic old man."

She was just about to stomp out of the kitchen when Murdoch blocked her way. "Always so kind and ladylike… My apologies, Miss Watson, I shouldn´t have doubted your housewifely skills. Of course I am anxious to try whatever you are going to serve me. I am sure it will be delicious." His voice dripped with sarcasm to such an extent that Evelyn couldn´t miss it.

She crossed her arms. "Fine, Mr. Murdoch. After tasting my expert cooking you will be begging me on your knees to get my food for the rest of your life. And then you will be hopefully deeply ashamed of yourself."

Murdoch shot her a challenging grin. "Miss Watson, I can´t wait until tonight." He bowed dramatically and took her hand: "My love, it´s a pity but I have to leave you right now. My office is calling for me." To her embarrassment he kissed her hand, shrugged on his officer's jacket nonchalantly afterwards and walked out of the kitchen. "I´ll put the money onto the cupboard", he called from the corridor.

Evelyn leaned onto the doorframe and watched him putting on his greatcoat, cap and gloves. Murdoch tipped his head: "Good bye then." Evelyn just nodded.

When the door clunked shut, Evelyn let out a breath. That bloody idiot with his presumptuousness. She WAS a good cook. But he would get a nasty surprise. Slowly, an idea formed in her mind. Determined to prove her skills, she headed up the stairs into Murdoch´s office. Immediately she spotted the various boxes that contained her books. Murdoch hadn´t unpack them yet. Frantically, Evelyn started to rummage through the boxes, scattering the whole floor around her with books. Where the hell…."Got cha!" she said finally, holding the thick cook book she had been searching for victoriously in the air.

"_Traditional dishes of the British Isles"_

Ha! She WAS a librarian after all and everything could be found in a book. Quickly, Evelyn skimmed through the pages, until she found the chapter she was looking for:

_The Haggis is a traditional Scottish dish, often considered to be the Scottish national dish. Haggis is a kind of savoury pudding containing sheep's pluck; __minced__ with __onion__, oatmeal, __suet__, spices, and salt, mixed with __stock__, and traditionally encased in the animal's stomach and __simmered__ for approximately three hours. It is traditionally served with _"_neeps and tatties" (Scots: __rutabaga__ and __potato__), boiled and __mashed__ separately and a dram (a glass of __Scotch whisky_)_._

Splendid! THAT should teach him. Nothing could please a man more than to serve him the food of his childhood. That Haggis-Stuff sounded extraordinary disgusting, though and Evelyn wrinkled her nose. Surely only a Scot could eat something like this. Well, she would just have to stay with the vegetables. But after tonight, Murdoch would be forced to honor her cooking. Oh yes, she would serve him a dish to remember. Admittedly, she had never cooked something like this at all, but hey! It couldn´t be that difficult, right?

XxxxxxX

"She hit you with a bath-brush?"

Charles Lightoller was convulsing with laughter. He was perched again Murdoch´s desk whilst Murdoch himself was seated on his chair, cradling his still aching head in his hands.

"Stop mocking me, Lights. It´s not funny, you know!"

Lightoller was crying now. "Blimey Will, you´re such a moron."

"You´re just like her! I didn´t walk in on her on purpose. It was a bloody coincidence!" Murdoch was clearly annoyed while Lightoller had to wipe his eyes.

"I believe every word, Will. But how can you be so bloody stupid as to sneak after her into the bathroom and then even miss a little glance at her?"

Murdoch stared at his friend disbelievingly: "Are suggesting that I should spy after her?"

"William! You have a nineteen year old naked woman in your bathroom and you didn´t even think about having a tiny little look at her?"

Murdoch frowned. "Of course not. That girl is my ward. I would never take advantage of her."

Lights shook his head. "You´ll die as an old maid, Will." Murdoch shrugged. "I certainly will, Lights, but I don´t think that molesting the poor girl would change anything about that."

"And what happened after she gave you your headache?" Lightoller inquired.

"We had a fight, of course. And then we had another fight about money. And after that we had again another fight about her cooking skills."

"You two like fighting, do you?"

Murdoch shot him an evil eye. "Very funny, Lights. Actually SHE is the one to start arguments. And now she is going to cook me a meal. I bet she´s actually trying to poison me."

"You two will make a fine couple one day," Lights mused and winked. "By the way…What did your precious Mrs. Cummings say about your newfound love?"

"Gladly she doesn´t know about it yet. She has left luckily a bit earlier to visit her sister over the Christmas days. Gives me a little bit more time to reconsider a strategy."

Lightoller smirked. "Do you think there´s the possibility of her getting a heart-attack about it?"

"LIGHTS!"

"Just kidding, just kidding."

Murdoch straightened himself and changed into his officer-mode. "Mr. Lightoller! Your work won´t take care of itself. So you better hurry up or I´ll have to force you to do overtime."

Lights shot his friend a foul glance and mock saluted. "Yes sir!" he barked and went to his own desk.

XxxxxX

When Murdoch was finally able to head home, he felt utterly exhausted. What a day. A nasty, constantly throbbing bump had formed on his forehead and his headache was overwhelming by now.

Today was one of those days where literally everything went wrong. Whole twenty-six maids and stewards had decided to decline their service on Titanic and now Murdoch – being the chief officer – was the one to produce alternatives. Rubbing his face, he actually felt glad to come home. And maybe an edible meal would await him. Suddenly he found himself looking quite forward to see Evelyn. It was the first time that somebody would wait for him at home after all. Will rubbed his hands together and his breath condensed in the freezing air. Surely they would have white Christmas this year.

Finally he reached his house and spotted immediately the light shining through the kitchen windows. Exited, he unlocked his door and was just about calling out a cheery "I´m home", when IT hit him.

The most abhorrent and emetic smell he had ever experienced in his life met his nose and instantly made him feel sick. From the kitchen came some small whimpers and frantic chattering.

Reluctantly, he closed the door behind him.

"Miss Watson? Are you in there?" he carefully called his ward whilst divesting himself of his coat, hat and gloves. A distressed squeal reached his ears, before a quite disheveled Evelyn emerged from the kitchen.

"Mr. Murdoch…you are home already?" She laughed nervously.

Murdoch observed her critically. The girl was a complete mess. Her hair was tousled and her glasses sat agley on her little nose. The white apron she wore over her trim black dress was blotchy from top to bottom. Her face was flushed and sweaty, her eyes glassy. She seemed to be on the verge of crying.

Concerned, Murdoch took a step towards her. "Evelyn…is everything alright?"

She kept her gaze on the floor and wrung her hands nervously. "Well, ehm, you see", she stammered before weakly faking a smile, "Of course it is. I mean, dinner is fine."

Murdoch lifted one eyebrow. "Is it now? Well, let´s have a look then." He was about to step into the kitchen (although his nose screamed to stay outside), when Evelyn frantically blocked his way. "I, uhm, Mr. Murdoch…I am not entirely sure if you´ll like it and…"

Gently, Murdoch shoved her little form away and stepped towards the stove. Something was simmering in a large pot and it was clearly the source of the sickening smell. Murdoch´s eyes started to water, but bravely he moved over to gaze into the pot. Instantly he regretted it. Inside the pot swam a big, indefinable grey meatball. Secretly, Murdoch pressed the back of his hand under his nose, took the fork, which lay beside the stove, and carefully prodded the meatball with it. What the hell was this? Was that girl really trying to poison him in the end? Coincidently his gaze fell upon the book lying on the sink and suddenly it dawned on him. He turned to Evelyn who was still standing in the doorframe. "You´ve made me a Haggis?"

She nodded slightly. "I have tried so…"

"Well, thank you. It, ehm, smells…interesting." Inwardly, he cringed. Haggis…the nightmare of his childhood. He was damn proud to be a Scot, but that dish made him question himself. But the Haggis his mother and grandmother had fed him as a child were nothing in comparison to that…abnormality Evelyn had produced. There was no way he could eat that, but how to tell her?

He cleared his throat and was about to consider a somewhat friendly excuse, when he heard her silent sniveling. Was she crying? Over a dish gone wrong?

Immediately, his heart softened and he walked slowly over to her. "Miss Watson?" Evelyn just shook her head.

"Evelyn?" he used her first name this time. Gently he tipped her head upwards and locked eyes with her. "Easy, lassie. What are you crying about?"

Evelyn looked at him dumbstruck. He couldn´t be THAT daft, could he?

"Well…", he said, "if you don´t mind, I would like to try some of your food. I´m quite hungry."

Her eyes widened disbelievingly. "Pardon me?"

"I asked if you would be so kind as to serve me some food. I´m hungry."

"_Are you nuts, William? Do you wanna die from food pois__oning?" _his subconscious screamed, but outwardly he stayed perfectly calm and sat down on the table, shooting Evelyn an encouraging smile.

The latter shook her head. "Mr. Murdoch…are you sure?"

_No! We are not sure, William!_

"Of course, I´m famished."

Eyeing him suspiciously, she walked over to the stove and got the Haggis out of the pot. Loathly, she cut a piece off for him and put it on a plate, together with some smashed potatoes and turnips. The smell was unbearable.

Awkwardly she handed him the plate and stared at him. "Here you go". He couldn´t really eat this, could he?

Murdoch tried not to look too closely at the mess on his plate. Aware that Evelyn's´ eyes followed his every move, he bravely took his fork, squeezed his eyes shut and shoved a tiny piece of the mess from his plate into his mouth. Christalmighty…

He opened his eyes again and found Evelyn´s transfixed stare. With great effort he forced a smile onto his face: "Truly delicious" he rasped.

Evelyn couldn´t believe her eyes. Murdoch´s forehead glistened with sweat and his hands started to shake. Nevertheless he took another bite. Was he actually turning green?

A lunatic grin formed on his face as he eat piece after piece, desperately trying to hide his shaking hands from her. Why he was doing this? Damn god, he just couldn´t see a girl cry.

An eternity later, he finally gulped down the last piece of food. By now, his complexion had changed from green into an ashen pale and he was drenched in sweat.

Hesitantly, Evelyn handed him a glass of water, and Murdoch drowned it hastily. Unsure, if his legs would still carry him, he got up very carefully and laid a shaking hand on Evelyn´s shoulder. "Miss Watson, I thank you for your efforts and your delicious meal. Best Haggis I´ve ever had. If you´ll excuse me, I´m right back in a moment. Just have to use the bathroom for a minute."

Still shocked, Evelyn watched him racing up the stairs surprisingly fast. There was no doubt he was going to throw up immediately. Why had he done this? After their fight this morning, she had been sure he would harass her non-stop about her weak attempt to cook a Scottish dish. But he had eaten it. He had truly eaten it. And there could be only one reason…It seemed as if he actually didn´t want to hurt her. Suddenly, something wet dropped onto her hand and she noticed that she had started to cry.

That strange man had just done the probably kindest thing to her she had ever experienced.

XxxxxxxxX

_Authors note: Here we are guys. I´ll just have to do another disclaimer. I´m doing it here at the end because I didn´t want reveal too much at the beginning. The explanation of Haggis in Evelyn´s cookbook belongs to Wikipedia ;-)  
_

_I didn´t want to insult Scottish people or Scottish dishes...but come on guys, Haggis is just...weird ;-) Don´t be mad with me!  
_

_A special thanks goes to __**Patrick Verona´s Cougar **__who enlightened me about Scottish dishes and traditions. Thank you so much *hugs*_

_I hope you have enjoyed this chapter more than Will did enjoy his dinner! Please leave a review!_


	8. Strange feelings

_Disclaimer: Nothing from Wikipedia in this chapter. The rest still remains the same!_

_First of all I want to thank those who have reviewed. I was surprised how much you enjoyed last chapter and I hope I won´t disappoint you with the next ones! _

_A special thanks goes again to Patrick Verona´s Cougar…you know why!_

_The next special thanks goes to Zero401…you also know why!_

_Ha, won´t tell any secrets here ;-)_

XxxxxxxX

Thursday, December 22nd 1911

The first snow of the year had fallen and the houses and streets looked as if they had been frosted with icing sugar. Overall people were getting ready for the Christmas holidays by buying Christmas presents or making errands of all kind. The whole city of Southampton was literally humming with excitement.

William Murdoch strolled happily through the jolly chaos, enjoying the busy people immensely. He loved Christmastime. Even at the age of thirty-eight he couldn´t help but feeling giddy as a little boy. He had just left his office early today and was somewhat looking forward to come home. Since that Haggis-incident, Evelyn and him got along better with each other. They had settled in a kind of routine now, her doing the household and him going to work, but not before sharing a hearty Scottish breakfast with her. And when he got home, she would await him with a nice dinner. Evelyn had not lied to him when she told him to be a good cook. Aside from the fateful Haggis she really did know how to please a man´s stomach. He even found himself more and more enjoying her company, for she was witty, intelligent and had a surprisingly wry sense of humor sometimes.

Of course, she hadn´t completely stopped harassing him from time to time, but it was in a more playful and amicable way now. The only thing he regretted was that she still referred to him as "Mr. Murdoch", although he called her on her first name most of the time now. At least, she didn´t seem to mind that.

He had to admit that Evelyn Watson was a rather peculiar little person. Sometimes she behaved stubborn like a child and other times she showed a wisdom and knowledge far beyond her age. And then he had noticed those strange moments, when she held a nearly haunted and sad expression to her eyes.

A little boy dashed past William, the mother right on his heels. According to the woman´s shouting, her little son had sneaked away something from her various bags; perhaps he had gotten himself an early Christmas present this way. Murdoch chuckled when he saw those two disappear into the crowds. As a child, he used to give his mother more than one time a run for her money due to his constant raid for his Christmas presents.

Murdoch sighed heavily and the thoughts about his family clouded his good mood. Normally he would travel back home to Scotland to celebrate Christmas with his parents and his siblings, but this year he would stay in Southampton. There was simply no way he could introduce Evelyn to his family. First of all, they wouldn´t understand why he had never mentioned her before becoming engaged to her. And how should he tell them in April that they would decline their wedding? He would simply break his mother´s heart if he did so.

Of course, leaving Evelyn alone wasn´t an option either. Not only because he was worried about her safety but mainly because he couldn´t stand the thought of her being lonely on Christmas Eve. Even though that girl would never be a desirable woman to him, he nevertheless cared about her in a strange way. It seemed as if you couldn´t live together with somebody without becoming somewhat attached to said person.

Lost in his thoughts his gaze fell suddenly upon one of the shop-windows. It showed all kinds of women´s coats, scarves, gloves, hats and other attire. One particular scarf with a matching pair of gloves caught his interest. Slowly an idea formed in his mind and a wide smile appeared on his face. Without further ado he stepped towards the little shop and went inside.

Behind a sales counter sat an elderly woman; she seemed to be rather busy with something. But when she heard the ring of the little bell announce a customer´s presence, she looked up at Murdoch. The latter tipped his head politely: "Good afternoon, Ma´am!"

„Good afternoon to you, sir. Of what assistance can I be to you?"

"Well, I am searching for a Christmas present and I am interested in one of your scarves shown in the window", Murdoch explained.

"Would you be so kind as to describe it, sir, so that I can get it out for you?"

"Of course. It´s green and embroidered with little flowers. And there was a matching pair of gloves, if I am not mistaken."

The elderly woman smiled knowingly. "Oh yes, one of the nicest scarves we are selling. Wait a minute, please."

Murdoch watched her rummage through the window display. Suddenly he felt somewhat insecure. Was he overstepping his boundaries if he got Evelyn a Christmas present? And how would she react? Would she be happy about this? Or would she believe it to be another attempt of him to take advantage of her?

The saleswoman stopped is rambling thoughts for she had found the scarf in question. "Here it is, sir. Would you please follow me?" Without waiting for his answer, she stepped through the small room and spread the scarf over the sales counter. Murdoch stepped up to her.

"Look at those beautiful embroidered roses. It´s truly one of the prettiest pieces we have in store. Something for your sweetheart, I believe?"

Murdoch traced the fine material absentmindedly with his fingertips. The scarf was made out of extraordinary soft, emerald green wool. Delicate white roses and little leaves were stitched in. The saleswoman was right, it WAS a pretty.

"Sir?"

Murdoch looked up at her. "My apologies, Ma´am. I fear I have missed your question."

The woman smirked. "If you don´t mind, sir, I was asking if that scarf was for your sweetheart?"

Murdoch gazed at her thoughtfully. Finally, he managed a smile. "Well…sort of. Could you gift-wrap it, please? I´ll take it, together with the gloves."

"Of course, sir. It will be my pleasure."

Murdoch watched her as she gently put the scarf and the gloves into a small colored box, before wrapping a huge red bow around it. It was a pretty little present and he was hopeful that Evelyn would like it. He vividly remembered the evening he had taken her to his house and how cold she had gotten then. A new warm scarf was really something she could use.

"Do you like it this way, sir?"

"Very much, thank you. How much do I owe you?"

"Twelve pounds, sir."

Murdoch nodded and handed the money over to her.  
"I hope your girl will like it, sir. I wish you merry Christmas days." She handed him over the little bag containing the wrapped up box.

William smiled at the elderly woman. "I´m sure she will, Ma´am. And merry Christmas to you as well." He tipped his head politely and left the store. To his surprise he felt rather giddy and exited. His already good mood had gotten even better and he fastened his steps. It was still rather early in the afternoon and maybe Evelyn would join him in a walk to the market. They had to make errands for the holidays after all.

XxxxxxxxxX

Meanwhile Evelyn clapped her hands together and observed her surroundings. Yes, she was DEFINITELY very satisfied with herself. She was standing in the middle of Murdoch´s living room and smiled like Cheshire cat. It had taken her half of the morning to get some Christmas spirit into the house and she had finally succeeded. The whole living room was decorated now with various Christmas baubles, holly branches and even a little mistletoe. The latter however, hung from the ceiling in an innocuous corner. Just to be sure of course. But the one thing that really made her proud was the large floor vase. It had taken her whole strength to drag it into the living room but the result was really worth her efforts. Since Murdoch had no accommodations to set up a real Christmas tree, Evelyn had had to improvise and she had done brilliantly.

In the midst of the living room now stood a large lithic floor vase filled up with long and thick fir sprigs. She had decorated them additionally with beautiful red and gold bows.

Something soft brushed slowly past her ankles and caused Evelyn to smile. She crouched down to scratch the small tomcat behind his ears.

"Hello Paul."

The cat started to purr and fawned in front of her, encouraging the girl to stroke his furry back. Paul belonged to Murdoch´s neighbor Mrs. Cummings, who had left to visit her sister over the Christmas holidays and since she knew Murdoch would stay at home this year, she had asked him to look after her cat.

Evelyn smirked. That cat surely had a splendid knowledge of the human nature. While Paul would either ignore Murdoch or hiss at him, the little animal literally adored Evelyn. Murdoch had called it "love at first sight" and he was right for once. The moment the tomcat had laid his eyes on Evelyn he became attached to her and now followed her almost anywhere.

"What do you think, Paul? Do you like it here?"

Paul strolled lazily through the room, observing the newly added things and occasionally sniffing at them. Evelyn couldn´t help her tender smiling when she watched the little pet. Although Murdoch wasn´t overly happy that she kept him inside the house, there was no way she would leave Paul alone outside or in the neighbor-house. Slowly, she slipped off her shoes and lowered herself onto the sofa, curling her legs beside her. She hadn´t slept well last night and she felt rather exhausted after cleaning and decorating the house. Paul meowed quietly and scurried towards the sofa. Evelyn patted her legs. "Come here, sweetie".

The cat complied and jumped already purring onto the couch before snuggling into her lap. Evelyn started to stroke and crawl him; feeling herself getting even more tired. Yawning she took off her glasses and put them onto the sofa table. Murdoch wouldn´t be home for a while which presented her with the chance to take a little napkin before she had to prepare dinner.

She sighed contentedly and lay her head down on a soft pillow. Still petting Paul, she felt sleep slowly engulf her.

XxxxxxxxX

When Murdoch got home, he closed the door as silently as possible behind him. He waited a few minutes to sort out if Evelyn had heard him coming in. When she didn´t make an appearance, he quietly tiptoed over to a little sideboard that stood next to the kitchen door. Quickly, he opened one of the drawers and shoved the little gift-box inside, hiding it securely under a bunch of kitchen towels and oven cloths.

"Evelyn?" he called after he had shut the drawer again. His young housemate didn´t answer.

"Evelyn", he called again, "are you home?"

When he didn´t get an answer again, he started to worry. Where could she have gone? Slightly alarmed he started to search for her.

When he stepped into the living room, he stopped dead in his tracks and stared at his surroundings in awe. The whole room looked as if it were a giant Christmas present. Everywhere glistened Christmas baubles and holly branches and the huge bunch of fir sprigs that stood inside a large floor vase gave off the aromatic scent of forests and wood.

_What the..._

Thoroughly amazed he turned around slowly to take everything in. In the process, his gaze fell onto the sofa and – to his surprise – upon Evelyn herself. The girl rested there, obviously sound asleep and she was truly a vision of delight. A soft smile appeared on Murdoch´s face and he stepped quietly closer to her. Paul the cat had ensconced himself in her lap and dozed peacefully in his cosy nest. Will crouched down beside her head and observed her sleeping face a little bit closer. Her head was slightly turned to the right side and her glasses were amiss. One of her arms was draped loosely across her chest, the other one lay right beside her face. Some of her chocolate brown curls had sneaked out of her normally tight bun and fell loosely across her freckled cheeks.

A weird feeling settled into Murdoch´s stomach as he drank in the sight in front of him. Her features were relaxed in her sleep and without her glasses she looked so much prettier than normal. Unable to stop himself, Murdoch raised his hand to gently stroke the curls out of her face; tucking them securely behind her ear. The weird feeling increased when his fingertips brushed her soft skin and hair causing her to sigh in her sleep. Murdoch gulped and against his better judgement he let his fingers rest a little bit longer against her cheek. His heartbeat quickened his pace for a moment, before a low snarl snapped him out of his thoughts.

Paul had woken up and eyed him suspiciously. Murdoch frowned.

"Shut up, Paul. I don´t mean any harm to her", he spit angrily. That terrible beast with his newfound over protectiveness towards Evelyn drove him nuts. The tomcat glared at him unabashed and hissed. Murdoch rolled his eyes and gazed one last time onto Evelyn´s sleeping face before getting up to his full height again.

"You know Paul, one day you will make a fine pair of earmuffs."

Grumbling he turned from Evelyn and headed out of the living room. He had decided not to wake her up. He knew she hadn´t slept well the other night and she really could use some rest.

Murdoch jogged upstairs into his bedroom and quickly divested himself off his uniform. It was always a relief to get rid of the stiff attire. He pulled out a fresh white shirt and a pair of comfortable black pants and went to the bathroom to wash his hands and his face. Refreshed, he got himself a book out of his library before strolling back to the living room again, where he settled into his cosy armchair and started to read.

XxxxxxX

Evelyn awoke two whole hours later and stretched her arms over her head, yawning pleasurably. My, she had needed that little nap. A quiet voice with a soft Scottish accent startled her. "Rise and shine, sleeping beauty."

Evelyn bolted upright, which made the still sleeping cat in her lap fly half across the room. Paul landed rather cat-like onto his four pads, screeched and turned tail and ran. Murdoch snickered gleefully: "Bye bye, Paul!"

"Mr. Murdoch, you git! You did that on purpose, didn´t you?"

Murdoch looked at her and had to hide a grin. Her hair was a dishevelled mess and her eyes looked rather drowsy. Over and above the pillow she had slept on had left a mark on her cheek.

"Of course I didn´t, Evelyn. Why on earth should I mean any harm to precious Paul?" he replied, looking completely innocent.

"Pff, I don´t believe you. Leave him alone! And by the way...what the hell are you doing here already?"

Murdoch chuckled. "You should sleep for a little while longer. It made you look so harmless and peaceful for a change. And to answer your question: First of all, I am living here. Secondly, I left my office a bit earlier today and thirdly, what do you mean when you say already? It´s half past six right now!"

"It´s what?" Evelyn jumped to her feet. "Oh no, I have totally overslept. I haven´t prepared anything for dinner yet and we have to buy food and...and...and where are my glasses?"

Murdoch got up and laid a calming hand to her shoulder. "Relax, lassie. Your glasses are on the table and you don´t have to cook today. You could use your rest. And besides...I have decided that I would like to take you out for dinner tonight."

Evelyn put on her glasses and couldn´t help but smile at him. "You really mean that?"

Murdoch nodded and bowed before her. "If you´ll do me the honour, Miss Watson, it would be my pleasure to escort you to dinner. Consider it as a little repayment for your splendid work, little Christmas Elf!"

Evelyn blushed slightly. "I take it that you like it, then?"

"Of course, it´s perfect!" Smirking, he took her hand into his and placed a soft kiss onto her knuckles: "Thank you."

Evelyn blushed a shade darker when he released her hand. "You´re in a good mood today, sir."

"Of course I am. It´s Christmas time, my home looks cosy and I just got me a lovely dinner date. Three good reasons to feel happy."

"Very well then, Mr. Murdoch. If you´ll excuse me for a few minutes, I am going to see that I will look presentable for our dinner date. I´ll be right back." To his and her own surprise, she winked at him rather flirtatiously and headed up the stairs to her bedroom.

Once she had shut the door behind her, she slumped against it, grinning like a lunatic. Had she just flirted with William Murdoch? And was she truly feeling giddy about going out with him?

_Don´t be ridiculous, Evelyn. You´re just still a little bit sleepy and you both were in a good mood. Nothing to feel excited about._

Evelyn took a calming breath and walked towards her mirror. Immediately, she cringed. She looked like a mess.

_Bloody perfect. And so you´ve made a fool of yourself in front of him again!_

She took her time to smooth out her hair and even decided to put on a new dress. Although she normally loved to wear black dresses, she wished for something slightly more colourful tonight. Rummaging through her cupboard, she finally decided for a navy-blue dress, that was cut out lower than normal and embroidered with soft white lace around the sleeves and the cleavage.

Satisfied, she took a last glance into the mirror, before heading downstairs again.

Murdoch was waiting for her in the corridor. They slipped into their coats and scarves simultaneously, before Murdoch held out his arm to her and smiled. "Ready?"

"Ready when you are!"

XxxxxxxX

It was nearly midnight when Murdoch and Evelyn stumbled laughing out of the pub again, both feeling a little bit merry from drinking a couple of beers. Slowly, she looped her arm around his and beamed at him brightly. "Thank you, Mr. Murdoch. Honestly, I had a wonderful time tonight!"

The same weird feeling he had experienced earlier in the afternoon returned to his stomach as he looked down into her smiling face. "As I have had, Evelyn. It is me who should thank you for your company. Maybe you´ll do me the honour as to accompany again sometimes?"

"Absolutely."

Careful not to show her any of his strange emotions, he pulled her a little bit closer to him as they started their way home.

A comfortable silence settled between them as they strolled lazily through the cold night, enjoying the slight snowfall, both feeling completely at ease with each other for the very first time.

Oh yes, it could have been the perfect evening, harmonically, peacefully, wonderfully...

They had already gone half of the way home and passed some pubs, when loud shouting reached their ears. William and Evelyn exchanged curious glances before they spotted three figures in front of one of the pubs, obviously in a severe argue.

"I told you to stay away from my girl!"

"Hey I just talked to her. I didn´t mean anything!"

The biggest of the three had grabbed a smaller guy by the collar and was shaking him slightly. The third figure stood with his arms crossed next to them.

"I´ll teach you some manners you dirtbag!"

Evelyn gasped when the big guy put his knee into the smaller guy´s stomach. She pulled Murdoch´s sleeve. "We have to help him, come on!"

"Evelyn...", he started to calm her down, "these are boys and sometimes boys have to sort out their problems like this. I´m not sure if we should interfere."

Evelyn yanked her arm from his angrily. "Men! You are all the same. If you are going to do nothing, I will do it on my own."

Before he could stop her, she was already running towards the three brawlers.

"Evelyn!"

Murdoch started to dash after her, but it was already too late.  
"Hey, you two! Leave him alone!"

Evelyn was about to touch the bigger guy by the shoulders when suddenly something solid hit her hard in the jaw, making her see stars before everything around her went black.

XxxxxxX

When Evelyn opened her eyes, she found herself again lying on the sofa in Murdoch´s living room and she couldn´t really remember why. When she tried to sit up, she noticed the maddening ache in her head, causing her to flinch.

"You should lie back down, you know."

Murdoch appeared in her field of vision, holding something in his hand. Carefully, he sat down next to her and gently pressed something cold against her jaw. Evelyn hissed in pain.

"Ssshhh, stay still", he soothed and lightly touched her forehead. "You got yourself a nice blow to the jaw. I´m afraid there will be a bruise tomorrow."

Evelyn groaned and lay her head carefully back against the pillow. "What happened?"

"To make it short: One of those blokes punched you right in your face and you fainted."

"I thought so", she replied and flinched again when he pressed the cold something a bit harder against her jaw. "What is this?", she asked.

"Ice", he replied simply and showed her the towel filled up with snow, "the coldness will ease the pain."

"And what happened after I blacked out?"

Murdoch smirked. "Well...You could say that I taught them some manners. I AM a sailor after all." Evelyn tried to smirk right back at him but the pain in her jaw told her otherwise. She felt the weight of his arm rather prominently across her upper body. Murdoch stroked tenderly over her uninjured cheek. "You know, you gave me quite the heart attack when you fainted."

Evelyn locked eyes with him. The warm concern she found in his gaze made her feel weird. "How did I get home?"

"Guess how...I carried you, of course!"

She had dreaded this answer because it did nothing to ease her nervousness. Desperate to change the subject she blurted out the first stupid comment that came to her mind. "Look at that...Rather impressive to carry me the whole way for someone your age..."

Murdoch looked at her unbelievingly and narrowed his eyes. "Now I know that I don´t have to worry too much about you. As long as you can still insult me I suppose there´s not too much harm done. And besides...I am a sailor, Evelyn. I´m used to do HEAVY labour."

Her expression became scandalized: "Are you implying that I am fat, Mr. Murdoch?"

Will glared back. "I´ll leave the interpretation to you, Miss Watson, and now", he pressed the towel into her own hand, "the old man is going to go to bed. Good night, Evelyn. I am pretty sure that you will be fine."

Before she could make any reply, he stood up and left fuming for his bedroom.

XxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxX

Author´s Note: There you have it guys! I hope you´ll enjoy it and leave a little review. I am going on holidays for a week on Tuesday, so it might take a while before I will update again. But I promise to do so as quickly as possible!

Oh and I apologize for every mistake, but it took me so long to write, I was just desperate to post this chapter!


	9. The secrets of a female body

_**Author´s note:**_ _First of all, the Disclaimer is still the same…will it ever change again sometimes?_

_An enormous "thank you" goes to Patrick Verona´s Cougar! You know what I mean, dear!_

_And the next special thank you goes again to Zero401!_

XxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxX

December, 23th 1911

When Evelyn woke up on Friday morning she felt completely in pain. Her head hurt as if it had been kicked by a horse and she felt a terrible nausea and sickness wash over her the moment she got up from the bed. Miserably she grabbed her dressing gown and wrapped it securely around her body before she headed timidly to the stairs. The arguing she had had with Murdoch the other evening really bothered her. Admittedly, she wasn´t particular proud of what she had said to him.

He had brought her home and cared for her after she had behaved like a lunatic again and the only thing that had come to her mind was being mean to him. Done again. And all because of her constant fear to open up to someone.

Evelyn sighed. She would have to apologize to him and hopefully he wouldn´t be too mad at her anymore. Straightening herself, she arrived at the kitchen door where she expected him to wait for her at the kitchen table. Nervously, she took a breath and stepped into the kitchen … only to find it empty. No Murdoch, neither on the table nor elsewhere, could be seen.

Evelyn was taken aback and glanced at the clock. It was only eight o´clock. To admit, this was indeed a bit later than she would normally breakfast with him, but usually Murdoch didn´t leave the house before half past eight.

"Mr. Murdoch? Are you still at home?"

Murdoch didn´t answer. Instead, she spotted a sheet of paper lying next to the sink.

_Evelyn,_

_I´m going to have my breakfast at the office today, ´cause I wanted to spare you from my gruesome company this morning. Although I have to admit that it was hard for someone my age to prepare a sandwich. I won´t be back until 6 because I am going to do the Christmas errands after work. I believe it would be wise for us not to be seen in public as a couple for the present time. We wouldn´t want anyone to think anyone that your abusive old pervert fiancé has beaten you up, right? I´m sure you are going to enjoy all the time alone with yourself, so I don´t need to wish you a good day._

_WMM_

A cold feeling settled into her stomach when she read the note over and over again. It seemed as if she had really gone over the top this time. He sounded so angry in that letter; angrier than he had ever been.

Unable to stop herself, Evelyn felt thick salty tears sliding down her cheeks. They dropped onto the paper, leaving wet spots on it and blurred the ink and his neatly written words.

Evelyn crumbled the paper between her small hands and tried to wipe the tears from her face. It seemed as if she was in a severe trouble now. She didn´t want to have a quarrel with him, especially not so close before Christmas. Admittedly, she had been really looking forward to spend the holidays with Murdoch. After all it would be the first time since her father´s death that she wouldn´t have to celebrate alone.

More tears wrenched their way out of her eyes and she stumbled out of the kitchen into the living room, where Paul the cat was slumbering peacefully on one of the sofa pillows. Desperate for some comfort, Evelyn walked towards the little animal and was about to pick him up, when Paul suddenly jumped up, gave her an evil eye and rushed out of the room. Obviously he was still huffy about the way he was treated the other day.

For a moment Evelyn stared dumbstruck at the spot where the cat had been lying, before she finally burst into tears. Did everyone hate her now? And why was she so extremely emotional at the moment?

Suddenly, a sharp pain jolted through her abdomen and the feeling of sickness and nausea overcame her again. No, not THAT. Not NOW. As if her situation wasn´t already bad enough.

Completely in despair, she sunk down next to the sofa and buried her head into her shaking arms, new tears flowing freely into the sleeve of her gown.

XxxxxxxxxxxX

William Murdoch was fuming. That was quite obvious, even to someone who didn´t know the Scotsman as well as Charles Lightoller did.

"What´s wrong, Will?" he finally asked his friend. "You seem to be rather troubled this morning."

"What makes you think I´m troubled?" Murdoch snapped at him.

Lightoller lifted his eyebrow. "You mean besides your evil stare and your constant brooding? You are killing your poor sandwich."

Murdoch looked at his breakfast and noticed that indeed he hadn´t eaten anything of it but had ripped it into tiny pieces instead. He groaned: "Leave me alone, Lights!"

Charles smiled knowingly. "Rough night?"

"No."

"Come on, Will. I know you are grumpy most of the time and I don´t mind that. You´re a Scot, it´s simply in your nature. But at the moment you´re almost unbearable."

Murdoch shot him another very evil glare, got up from his chair and stomped towards the window. "I´m not grumpy!"

"That´s right…you´re not grumpy, you are quite terrifying."

Murdoch kept staring out of the window and crossed his arms. "I´m neither grumpy nor terrifying and everything is in best order."

In truth, he was so angry that he wanted to throw something against the wall. He had really tried to get along with the lass, but Evelyn was just a feisty brat. Somehow he felt unusually bothered by her behavior towards him.

It had nothing to do with the weird feelings that washed over him as soon as he was in her company, right? RIGHT? Of course not. It was just a…well…strange brotherly affection. Nothing less and DEFINITLY nothing more.

"Did you two fight again?"Lightollers voice startled him from his thoughts.

"Sorry?"

"I asked if you two had a fight again. You and Miss Watson." Lightoller got up from his chair and stepped towards his friend. Leaning against the wall with his hands stuffed nonchalantly into his trouser pockets he observed Murdoch closely. "Well?"

Murdoch shot him a sideward glance and sighed.

"Aye", he nodded finally and then the words came flowing surprisingly fast out of his mouth, "she got herself into trouble, I saved her and brought her home, cared for her and she called me old in thanks. She does this all the time. Honestly Lights, I´m doing my best to get along with her but she won´t stop telling me that I´m too old and too boring and whatever for her." Annoyed he stepped away from the window and started to pace around.

Lightoller watched him alarmed. Since becoming engaged Will paced around awfully often. "Will…come on, calm down. She´s right after all. You ARE old."

"Says the man who´s barely a year younger than myself…"

"But I LOOK so much younger than you."

Murdoch looked like he wanted to punch his friend in the face. "Are you MY friend or HER friend, Charles Lightoller?"

Lightoller grinned wickedly. "Do you want a polite answer or an honest one?"

Murdoch stared at him blankly. "Thank you for nothing, Lights. As usual, you´re no help at all. Sometimes I really don´t know why I am calling you my best friend."

"Hey Will, come on. I´m just teasing. But bloody hell, you are earnestly troubled, aren´t you mate?" Lights shot him a curious glance. "One could think that you are really bothered about being eventually too old for her…"

Murdoch stopped his pacing and looked at his friend angrily. "Don´t be ridiculous, Lights. I am just annoyed about her foul behavior towards me. That´s all."

Lightoller snorted. "You know I don´t believe you, but I won´t pressure you to admit anything. By the way…Sylvia and I are planning our usual party on New Year´s Eve. Evelyn is invited of course. We both can´t wait to actually meet her."

Murdoch eyed him suspiciously. "I hope this isn´t another silly attempt to pair me off with her."

Lightoller snickered. "Why should anyone try to pair you off with her? You are already engaged to each other."

"Lights…"

"Calm down, Will", Lightoller held up his hands, "it´s just an invitation. Honestly. No hidden agendas, I swear! And come on, now. Cheer up, mate. After all, we´re nearly on holidays!"

Murdoch sneered. "Oh yes, merry Christmas."

XxxxxxxxxxX

It was half past six in the afternoon now and Murdoch headed home, carrying a full basket in each of his hands. Luckily he had finished making his errands rather smoothly this year. Normally it was kind of a war to buy food before Christmas Eve.

His mood however, had not gotten better at all. Quite the contrary. The thought of dealing with Evelyn again and having to spend three whole days with her was completely unnerving him. But he wouldn´t let her make a fool of him again. Tonight he would lay down the law.

Still dwelling on his gloomy thoughts, he reached his house and unlocked the front door. Stepping inside, he kicked the door shut with his foot and divested himself of his cap, coat and gloves, before taking his errands into the kitchen. Evelyn was nowhere to be seen.

Murdoch stepped back into the corridor and called her in his most demanding pitch of voice.

"Evelyn, I´m home and I wish to talk to you. NOW."

After a moment of silence a quiet and timid voice answered him from the living room: "I´m here."

Immediately he felt his diligently built up wrath break down. To hell with all that women and their blasted ability to soften him down. But no, not this time. Evelyn Watson needed to be put into place.

Steeling his resolve he stomped into the living room, only to stop dead in his tracks a few seconds later.

Evelyn sat there in one of the armchairs, hugging her knees with her arms and looking completely miserable. Her face was deathly pale and a huge blackish blue bruise was emblazoned on her jaw. Unable to help himself, Murdoch blushed slightly when he noticed her strange attire. She was wearing only a nightgown with a dressing gown on top; her feet were bare and her hair hung loosely braided over her shoulder, as if she had just gotten out of bed.

She gazed at him like a fearful doe with wide and terrified eyes. Her glasses lay forgotten on the table.

"Hello Mr. Murdoch." Her voice was unsteady, as if she was about to burst into tears.

At that moment she looked so pitiful and so fragile that Murdoch's heart went immediately out to her. Slightly Alarmed, he stepped quickly forwards and crouched down in front of the armchair she was sitting in.

"Evelyn, what has happened? Have you just gotten out of bed?"

"No...I changed a few minutes ago…I´m not feeling well and my dress was simply so uncomfortable…"

"Are you ill?" Concerned he gazed in to her eyes and brushed slowly as not to scare her lightly over her arm.

Evelyn stared at him with watery eyes and her lips trembled. "Mr. Murdoch…I…Mr. Murdoch."

Before he really knew what was happening, she suddenly leapt forward and flung her arms around his neck. Heartbreaking sobs shook her small body and he felt his shirt collar getting soaked from her tears.

Murdoch went rigid. This situation completely overcharged him. No, this woman overcharged him. A thin sheen of sweat appeared in his forehead. What to do? Hesitantly he wrapped his arms around her body, petting her back lightly. "Sshhh, lassie, steady steady."

"Oh Mr. Murdoch", Evelyn hiccupped with her head buried into the crook of his neck, "I´m so sorry. I´m so very sorry. "

Murdoch tightened the hold of his arms around her a little bit more and just let her cry. He had absolutely no clue what was troubling her so badly. Their fight from the day before couldn´t be the only reason for her outburst. Or was it the stupid letter he had left her? Was she really that heartbroken about it? And if she was, since when did she feel sorry about harassing him?

"Ssshh, Evelyn, calm down, calm down. Everything is fine." Murdoch tried his best to soothe her and apparently he did well, because slowly her crying subsided into silent sniveling. Gently, he grabbed her by her shoulders, untangled himself of her embrace and looked into her face. Her eyes were red and blurry from her crying and a few tears were still rolling down her cheeks. Unable to help himself, he lifted his hand and stroked over the uninjured side of her face, wiping the tears away in the process.

"Better?"

She nodded hesitantly. "Mr. Murdoch, I want to apologize. I´m so sorry. I was wrong and I am truly ashamed of my behaviour towards you. Please don´t be mad with you anymore. Please!"

Will stared at her dumbstruck. Not even in his dreams would he have dared to wish for an apology like this. Was that girl before him really the same Evelyn Watson he used to know?

Alarmed he saw her eyes become watery again when he didn´t answer immediately. Oh no, not another outburst!

"It´s alright, Evelyn. Apology accepted. I´m not angry with you anymore."

"Really?"

Murdoch smiled. "Really." To his horror, his words didn´t calm her down. Oh no, she threw herself at him again, new tears soaking his naval uniform furthermore. Slowly he wrapped his arms around her once more and petted her back awkwardly. "Ssshhh, it´s fine, it´s fine."

"Thank you, Mr. Murdoch. I´m so happy", she mumbled into his neck, "I don´t want to argue with you."

Murdoch could feel her breath against his throat and the touch of her skin against his sent shivers down his spine. The sweet scent of her hair reached his nose. Against his better judgment he leaned his cheek slightly against her head, one hand reaching up to stroke through her soft, silky curls.

The strange feeling settled into his stomach again, making him feel at peace and nervous at the same time.

"You´re welcome, wee lassie", he soothed her, his accent thickening whilst his voice dropped to a soft and tender tone. Evelyn was a peculiar person, no child anymore but not a mature woman either, and nevertheless she was knotting and twisting his insides as no female had ever before. Living with her was literally like riding on an emotional roller coaster.

They stayed in their position for a while, just silently holding each other. Evelyn´s crying had subsided long ago.

Suddenly Evelyn winced in pain and clenched his uniform firmly into her hands.

"Aaah"

Alarmed Murdoch shoved her away from him to look at her. Her eyes were squeezed shut in pain and she had laid a hand protectively over her lower abdomen.

"Evelyn, what happened? Are you ill?" Murdoch gazed worriedly into her pale face.

"It´s nothing", she rasped.

"Nonsense, lassie. It´s obvious that you are in pain. What´s wrong with yer?"

Evelyn shook her head, blushing slightly. "I can´t tell you."

Murdoch stared at her blankly. "And why can´t you tell me? Come on Evelyn. That´s not funny, you really look as if you could need some help. Shall I call the doctor?"

"Don´t you dare", she shouted, "believe me, everything is totally fine, it´s just...aahh damn!" She cringed again which caused Murdoch to frown.

"Nothing is fine here. I´ll call the doctor now, if you want or not!"

He was about to get up when Evelyn lunged forward and grabbed his arm. "No! Please no doctor, really, it´s alright, I don´t need a doctor."

Murdoch looked confused at her hand on his sleeve and crouched down again. "I won´t call the doctor if you tell me what´s wrong with you."

To his bewilderment she blushed furiously and shook her head, new tears forming in her eyes. "I can´t...it´s personal."

A cold feeling washed over him suddenly. Sweet lord, that couldn´t be, could it? Pain in her stomach? A feeling of sickness? A protective hand over her belly? A PERSONAL problem? Christalmighty...

Murdoch lunged forward and gripped her by the shoulders. "Who?"

Scared to death Evelyn backed away and stared at him open-mouthed: "Pardon me?"

Murdoch let go of her shoulders and jumped to his feet. "I´d never...you of all people...sweet Lord!" Flustered he started to pace around. Evelyn watched him completely dumbstruck. "Mr. Murdoch...I fear I don´t understand?"

"I don´t tolerate that Evelyn. I won´t judge you, but you MUST tell me who is responsible for your condition and when...IT...happened. And we have to inform Mr. Hartley. How could you not tell us? I mean, what if anyone thinks that it was me...No!"

Evelyn watched him even more confused. What the hell was that man talking about? "Mr. Murdoch?"

He scared her anew when he suddenly crouched down in front of her again, shooting her a look of deep sympathy and petting her hand. "Poor lassie...how terrible must you feel? Did he not even ask you to marry him? Or...oh no, Evelyn...please tell me that you haven´t been forced! If...I swear, I´ll kill him!"

"Kill whom? Mr. Murdoch, what are you talking about? Are you insane?"

"Ssshhh, lassie, I know that you don´t want anyone to know", Murdoch clasped her hand in his "but you have to acknowledge your sin now. After all...you´re going to be a mother soon."

That bloody idiot...

Evelyn yanked her hand away and started to laugh. Now it was Murdoch´s turn to look dumbstruck.

The girl wiped her eyes and shook her head still snickering. "Mr. Murdoch...you´re crazy. A mother? Gods no! I´m not pregnant!"

"You´re not...But you´re sickness...Evelyn, are you sure?"

"Completely sure, Mr. Murdoch. Don´t worry, I´m not to have a child..." She didn´t want to answer him fully, but judging by the looks he gave her, she could tell that he still didn´t believe her. "No, I´m not pregnant, Mr. Murdoch...it´s quasi the other way round..."

"The other way...oh." Murdoch´s face instantly flushed a deep crimson red making him look like a giant overripe tomato. "You mean you are having THAT mmph." He was cut out when Evelyn quickly put her hand over his mouth. "Don´t you dare...aaah!"

Again she cringed in pain. Murdoch took her hand away slowly.

"I´m sorry Evelyn, I really am. I just hopped to the wrong conclusion...but I think I know how to make up my mistake..."

To her surprise he got up and walked out of the room. Evelyn heard him rummage through the kitchen for a couple of while, before he finally returned, carrying a blanket in one hand and a hot-water bottle in the other. She looked up at him confused and noticed his rather sheepish smile. "Here you go, lassie." Carefully, he laid the bottle into her lap before wrapping the thick blanket around her lower body.

"And now...some good old Scottish medicine."

He walked over to a cupboard and returned a few seconds later with a small glass filled up with an amber liquid. "Here, drink this", he ordered and handed the glass over to her.

Evelyn eyed it suspiciously and sniffed at it. "What is it?"

Murdoch smirked. "A wee dram."

"A what?"

"A wee dram, lass. You would call it a small glass of Scotch Whisky, I guess. Don´t be shy and drink it. It´ll help you."

"Really?"

"Really! Come on now. Down in one!"

Evelyn still eyed him unconvinced but bravely she squeezed her eyes shut and emptied the glass quickly. The alcohol burnt its way down her throat and into her stomach, shaking her instantly with heavy coughing and causing her eyes to water. Murdoch chuckled and petted her back.

"Blimey," she rasped and gasped for air," that was disgusting."

Murdoch snorted and shook his head. "You English people...You are simply clueless about good tasting things. And now you should rest a bit and I´ll get us some dinner."

Still coughing she nodded weakly. "Whatever...as long as I won´t have to drink another glass of that so-called medicine."

"Don´t worry. One wee dram should be enough for a wee lass like you." He winked at her and left for the kitchen.

XxxxX

Two hours later Evelyn was still snuggled into her armchair, enjoying the warmth of the blanket around her and waiting for Murdoch to return from cleaning up the kitchen. She smiled to herself as she thought of him. He had been really adorable tonight, treating her with so much care as if she was a delicate porcelain doll. A warm feeling settled into her stomach and she found herself whishing for his return. Actually she didn´t have to wait for long because Will strolled into the room a moment later. He had divested himself of his tie, jacket and shoes and was about to unbutton his shirt collar.

Yawning he let himself fall rather ungracefully onto the sofa and smiled to her. "Feeling better?"

Evelyn nodded. "Yes, actually I do!"

"See. All thanks to the Whisky!"

"I hate to admit...but...rather thanks to you, sir. Which leads me to a question...How do you know how to deal with, uhm, you know..."

Murdoch smirked, finding her shyness quite cute. "How to deal with a female problem? I´m a grown man, Evelyn and although it may surprise you, I DID have the occasional girlfriend once in a while. And besides that I grew up with three sisters."

Her eyes went wide. "You have siblings?"

Murdoch chuckled. "Of course I have siblings. Five to be precise. Three sisters and two brothers." He noticed her curious expression. "Do you want to see them?"

"See them? I would love to, but how?"

"Wait a second!"

Evelyn heard him running up the stairs and saw him return a few minutes later with a thick book tucked under his arm. "Come here," he gestured to the seat next to him on the sofa, "I´ll show you."

Eagerly, Evelyn got up and moved with her blanket over to the sofa. He watched her curling her legs under her and snuggling into the blanket again.

Murdoch flipped the book open. It turned out to be a photo album. "See?" he pointed to the first photography that showed an overview of a small town "that´s Dalbeattie. This is where I was born and grew up."

"It´s in Scotland, isn´t it?"

"Of course it is, in the South actually. And this is my parent´s house, No.3 'Sunnyside', Barr Hill, Dalbeattie" he had turned the page and gestured to the next photography.

"It looks cosy."

"Oh yes, it is actually. When I´ll visit my family next time you could accompany me."

Evelyn smiled. "I´d love to."

She watched him intently and decided that she liked what she saw. His eyes had lit up and he was obviously rather eager to show her his family and his hometown. The warm feeling in her stomach increased and against her better judgement she leaned further towards him, resting her head against his shoulder.

Murdoch looked down at her and lifted an eyebrow. "Since when are so cuddly?"

Evelyn glanced back. "Don´t know. Must be the hormones I guess. Do you mind?"

Murdoch chuckled slightly. "Not in the least."

Smiling Evelyn snuggled up closer to him, listening to his various tales and inwardly feeling happier than she had in many years.

XxxxxxxX

_So guys, here it is. I know, it took me a while, but as I said I was on holidays. Maybe this chapter is a bit boring, but I want to take it slow. The next chapter will be the Christmas chapter, but somehow I wanted to do that first. So, I hope you´ll enjoy it nonetheless and leave me a little review! Thanks!_


	10. With this ring

_Disclaimer: I won´t say that again!_

_Author´s note: I´m soooo sorry guys that it took me so long to update, but first of all this is a VERY long chapter and secondly I have an incredibly busy job. The last two weeks were a nightmare. But I hope that this chapter was worth all the waiting. By the way...I gave up to try and put some Xmas-spirit in it...it´s simply impossible to do so in the midst of July *lol*  
Thank you again to all reviewers and supporters, especially to those two unknown guests and LTsangy! You three were really really lovely. Now on with the story. Enjoy and review please :3_

December, 24th 1911

The night before Christmas Eve had brought tons of new snow, wherefore Murdoch found himself rather early in the morning in front of his house removing the snow from the pavement and the stairs to his front door. Despite the freezing air a thin sheen of sweat had formed under his heavy coat and scarf due to his efforts and he paused a moment to wipe his forehead with the back of his sleeve.

A sudden movement he saw from the corner of his eye caught his interest and he turned around, only to see a furry tail quickly disappear behind one of the heaps of snow. Grinning Murdoch stepped over and peaked behind the heap only to be met by a pair of glimmering green eyes.

"Well, well, well, if that isn´t precious Paul", he teased and took a closer look "what are you carrying there?"

The cat hissed but lifted his head enough to reveal the dead mouse dangling from his mouth.

Murdoch made a face. "Urgh, Paul! A present for Evelyn? I don´t think that she´s going to like it much." The tomcat answered with a nasty growl before he scurried past Murdoch towards the garden.

"What won´t I like?" asked an amused voice from the front door. Murdoch turned around and found Evelyn leaning into the doorframe. She was clad in her usual black dress, her hair was styled in a tight bun and her glasses sat straight onto her nose. Nevertheless her face carried a mischievous smile, causing her eyes to lighten up and her face to look young and relaxed, despite her prim attire.

"I think you won´t like a mouse on the rocks", he said and stepped up to her "How are you feeling this morning, lass?

To his surprise she smiled softly at him. "Much better. Mr. Murdoch, I´d like to thank you very very much for kindness last night. You know, it meant a lot to me."

Murdoch blushed slightly and rubbed the back of his head with his hand. "You´re welcome, lass. You do not have to thank me again."

Evelyn nodded and grinned inwardly. Mr. Prim and Proper was thrown off guard by a little smile. "Breakfast is nearly ready. When are you finished here?" she asked him.

"Just a few more minutes", he answered and rubbed his hands together, "can´t wait for a nice cup of hot coffee."

Evelyn shook her head. "You and your coffee. Why don´t you take a civilised cup of English breakfast tea for a change?"she teased him, loving his instant frowning.

"Can you please stop harassing me about my drinking habits? Believe me, after sixteen years of working on ships without more than four or five hours of sleep a night, coffee becomes your best buddy."

Evelyn snickered and patted his arm. "Calm down, Mr. Murdoch. Coffee it is then. See you in a minute."

Watching her disappear back into the house Murdoch just shook his head and went back to work.

XxxxxxxxxX

Evelyn felt rather giddy. It was half past two in the afternoon now and she was preparing Christmas dinner for Murdoch and herself. How they should ever be able to eat a whole turkey she didn´t know but they would have the most traditional of all Christmas dishes nonetheless. The thought of celebrating with someone else made her feel beyond excited.

The rustling of a newspaper followed by an audible yawn made her turn around. Murdoch sat behind her at the kitchen table, a cup of his beloved coffee in front of him on the table and the newspaper lying beside it. Evelyn couldn´t help but grin when she watched him rub his eyes like a child.

"Are you tired?" she asked him.

He gazed at her through his fingers with weary eyes. "Indeed I am. Didn´t sleep well last night. Must be the full moon." Like on cue he yawned again.

Evelyn smiled softly at him. "Why don´t you lie down a bit and take a little nap? I´ll wake you when dinner´s ready."

He shook his head. "I don´t know. I don´t want to you to do all the work alone."

Evelyn sent him a stern glance. "I think I told you a thousand times by now, that there´s no need for you to help me. Really. I´d prefer you not to fall asleep on your plate later on."

She stepped towards him and ushered him out of his chair. "Go on, get some sleep. I´ll wake you soon enough."

He eyed somewhat unconvinced down at her. "Are you sure? I don´t want..."

"William Murdoch!", she cut him off and put her hands into her hips, "Go and lie down!"

"Yes, sir!", he barked and mock saluted before he scuffled once again yawning into the living room, ignoring the slight giddiness he had felt when she had used his first name.

Evelyn watched his retreating form and shook her head before she started her cooking again, letting herself become engulfed in her thoughts. Whilst chopping a few carrots she suddenly stopped working and just stared at her hands.

Would it feel like this? To be married? To be attached to another person?

Unable to stop her rambling mind, she started to imagine how it would be to be really engaged to William Murdoch. How it would be to be married to him. Her being his wife and him being her husband.

Evelyn shook her head. Stupid childish thoughts. William Murdoch was of course the very last person she would ever want to be married to. It was just naturally to think of him in that matter in their current situation. But...

If she were married to him...how would it feel like to be kissed by him? Or - and the next thought made her blush like mad - how would it be to...to... to... consummate their marriage?

_Evelyn! Are you insane?_

Her subconscious was screaming at her, but it couldn´t stop the hot feeling dripping down her spine; couldn´t stop the thousands of butterflies fluttering through her stomach. Never in her nineteen years of life had thoughts like that invaded her mind. Thoughts that made her feeling deeply embarrassed and strangely excited at the same time.

Suddenly faint sound from the living room reached her ears, distracting her from the disturbing images in her head. A quiet giggle left her throat when she recognized what she was hearing. Silently she tiptoed over to the living room and took a glance onto the sofa. Murdoch was fast asleep and snoring like a full-grown bear. Snorting Evelyn raised an eyebrow and shook her head. Whatever had had caused her to have amorous thoughts about this man she didn´t know, but Murdoch had unknowingly made damn sure to kill it this very moment.

XxxxxxxxX

Murdoch looked out of the window. Although it had grown dark by now he could see the snowflakes whirling outside in the wind. A glance at his pocket watch made him frown. Although Evelyn usually emphasised that she didn´t care about her appearance like "those typical brainless dolls", was she taking her time now to get dressed. But he wouldn´t scold or harass her tonight. It was Christmas Eve after all and although he missed his family he felt rather happy and relaxed.  
Smiling he turned around and observed the beautifully set table. Evelyn had really excelled herself. The delicious smell of roasted turkey hung in the room and the candles on the table – being the only light at the moment - dipped the room into a soft golden glow.

His gaze fell onto the door when Evelyn stepped into the room, carrying an uncertain soft smile upon her face.

Murdoch eyed her up and down in awe. "You look nice, Evelyn." She wore a fine low cut out dress in a rich plummy colour and a light lilac sash was wrapped around her waist.

Slightly blushing she stepped towards him, seemingly at a loss for words for the moment.

"You know, that bit more colour suits you rather well."

She smiled sheepishly. "Thank you, Mr. Murdoch. But honestly I feel somewhat more comfortable in my usual attire."

"I thought so, but there´s no reason to feel insecure at the moment. It´s pretty", he replied whilst observing her curiously a bit closer "What´s that in your hair?"

That question seemed to excite her and she quickly pulled a small butterfly-shaped comb out of her hair. "Isn´t it beautiful? Found it on the market last week when I was making some errands. I had to buy it." Smiling she stroked tenderly over the delicate rosy and green wings of the butterfly. Normally she wasn´t especially interested into fancy things or jewellery, but this particular piece had stolen her heart. She could honestly say that she was actually feeling proud to own it now.

Murdoch took the comb out of her hands and placed it gingerly back into her curls, locking eyes with her in the process. "Yes, very beautiful."

Not able to tell if he really just meant the comb, Evelyn blushed even more. Embarrassed she cleared her throat and gestured towards the table. "Aren´t you hungry, Mr. Murdoch?"

"Famished!"

"Let´s eat then before everything gets cold."

XxxxxxxX

December, 25th 1911

Christmas was usually a rather boring feast in Evelyn´s opinion. However, she had to admit that this year was different. William Murdoch could be a surprisingly pleasant companion. But only as long as he wasn´t beat four times in a row in a game of chess. Whilst drying the china they had used for breakfast, she couldn´t help but grin about yesterday evening´s events.

Murdoch hadn´t had a clue that he was challenging the ´s college junior chess champion when he asked her to join him in a little game after dinner.

Poor man. Obviously he wasn´t used to lose in anything he did. Shaking with laughter now she remembered his swearing and how he had literally ripped out some of his hair.

But she didn´t mind this once, not even the killing glance after her fourth "Checkmate!" or that he had called her an "evil and mean witch". No, this once she had limited herself to just bask in her glorious victory over him.

He had still been somewhat silent during breakfast but she couldn´t really tell if he was still grumpy. To her it had seemed as if he was somehow rather nervous about something. Wondering about his plans, she put the last plate into the cupboard and went to the living room to await his return.

In the meantime Murdoch was pacing nervously around his bedroom. The little gift box sat on his bed and seemed to stare at him. He had been so confident when he had bought the scarf for her, but now he felt rather timid to actually give it to her. How would she react? It had been clear that she didn´t expect them to exchange presents. Admittedly they had behaved rather civilised with each other the last two days but he knew Evelyn well enough to know that her moods could change faster than the weather on an April´s day. He stopped his pacing to gaze out into the garden. That girl was a mystery to him. It was annoying and unnerving how often she occupied his thoughts, but he couldn´t stop wondering about her. Everything about her was antithetic. Sometimes she seemed so mature and intelligent that he almost forgot how young she really was and the next time she behaved so immature and childish that she was almost unbearable. As much as he tried it, he simply didn´t know how he felt about her. Sometimes her mere presence made his heart beat faster; sometimes he simply wanted to protect her and other times he just wanted to strangle her. Even her looks were not easy to describe. She was by no means the typical beauty; not with her freckles and her glasses. But there was something in her eyes that drew him to her like a moth to the light.

Sighing he turned around and gazed at the present. To hell with all his rambling thoughts. It was Christmas after all and his brooding was rather ridiculous. Taking a deep breath, he picked up the little box and headed down to the living room.

Evelyn looked up from her book when she heard him enter. He stopped in front of the armchair she was sitting in and cleared his throat. To her wonder, he had hidden his arms behind his back.

"Evelyn, ehm, I have something for you." His voice was soft and slowly he revealed his right hand to her. Her eyes widened slightly when her gaze fell onto the colourful gift box he was holding out to her. Quickly she stood up from her armchair; the book fell forgotten to the floor.

"I hope you´ll like it. It´s not much but...Merry Christmas." Smiling he handed the present over to her.

Unsure and utterly surprised she locked eyes with him and blushed.

"Come on, lass, open it up."

"I...Mr. Murdoch, thank you but you shouldn´t have bought me something. I mean, I have nothing in return and..."

Holding up a hand, he stopped her rambling by laying a finger over her lips. "You think too much lassie. I wanted to give you a little something for Christmas and I did it and now I simply hope that you´ll like it. Please stop your fussing and take a look. Can you do that for me?"

Blushing even more she nodded and slowly started to unwrap the red bow. Carefully she opened the little box, reached inside and produced the beautiful emerald green scarf with delicate white roses stitched into it. Evelyn´s eyes lit up in wonder and she couldn´t help the slight squeal escaping her throat. Beaming she turned to him again. "Mr. Murdoch... It´s beautiful."

Happily she cradled the scarf in her hands, stroking the soft material and admiring the filigree flowers. Murdoch chuckled slightly. "I guess I made the right choice then?"

"Absolutely", she answered without looking at him. Apparently she was too preoccupied with her scarf.

Inwardly Murdoch´s subconscious roared like a lion. He was more than proud and satisfied with himself. Grinning he took the scarf out of her hands. "Well Miss, let´s see if it suits you."

With that he stepped a little bit closer to her and started to wrap the scarf around her neck. But due to her sheer excitement about this newest piece of fashion, Evelyn couldn´t stand idle. She constantly tried to look down herself, twisted and turned, so that Murdoch had to chuckle about so much childish delight. "Now stand still, you little tomboy or else I can´t do a proper knot. You´re worse than a basketful of fleas."

He had barely looped the loose ends together when she turned immediately to the door and raced outside to the floor, probably to have a look into the mirror. Shaking his head Murdoch followed her and could hear her gasp. She stood in front of the mirror clearly admiring the view and stroked softly over the scarf before burying her small nose into the wool.

Smiling he stepped up towards her until he could see his own reflection behind her in the mirror.

"It´s so pretty", she chirped happily, obviously not able to find more words to describe her joy.

"Do you remember the evening when I picked you up from your apartment? You got so cold on the way here and when I saw that scarf in one of the shops, I thought you could use it."

Evelyn nodded and locked eyes with him through the mirror. She was so small in height that he was a good head taller than her. To his surprise she didn´t say a word. Instead he could see some tears glistening in her eyes.

With a wide smile she slowly turned round until she faced him. Suddenly she let herself fall against him and buried her head into his chest. Caught off guard he looked down at her curly haired head before his arms reached out instinctively and encircled her petit form.

"You cannot imagine how much that means to me", she said quietly, her voice muffled from the fabric of his shirt, "it´s been years since I got a Christmas present."

Before he could make a reply, she backed away a tiny bit to look at his face again. "I thank you from the bottom of my heart...William."  
His eyes widened in gentle surprise when he heard his first name fall from her lips and for a few moments he just stared at her.

Unsure if she had overstepped her boundaries she quickly asked him: "I hope you don´t mind me calling you William, Mr. Murdoch. If you do, I apologise."

That seemed to coax Murdoch out of his trance. Instead of answering her he drew her close to his body once more and placed a kiss upon her head before burying his face into her curls. "No, lassie, I don´t mind. And you are very welcome."

Evelyn felt her heart beat like mad. It wasn´t her first time to hug him or to be near to his body, but she had never felt his arms so prominently around her, had never smelled the pleasant mixture of his aftershave and the smell of soap emanating from his clothes, had never heard his heartbeat under his strong chest.

Suddenly unsure about the feelings his closeness provoked in her body, she backed away and cleared her throat. "Very well, William", it still was strange to say his first name, "what are our plans for today?"

"I haven´t really thought about it, but since you are so fond about your scarf...What do you think about a little walk? We can see if the scarf indeed keeps you warm by doing so."

XxxxxxxxX

Half an hour later Will and Evelyn strolled slowly through the falling snow. She had looped her arm tightly around his and once in a while she glanced happily at her green gloved hand resting on his sleeve. It had been so sweet and affectionate from him to buy her a present and the scarf and gloves were so pretty. Evelyn hadn´t felt so happy in years.

A snowflake landed on her nose causing her to sneeze. Murdoch looked down at her and snickered. She shot him a glare. "It´s not nice to mock a lady when she is feeling unwell", she told him and raised her little nose somewhat arrogantly in the air.

Snorting he reached up and wiped the wet spot on her nose the snowflake had left there. "I agree, but...I honestly don´t see a lady around..."

Scandalized she yanked her arm away from his. "You..."

"I?"

"You are...evil!"

Murdoch burst into laughter. "Evil? Come on, Evelyn, that´s a bit harsh to say, isn´t it?"

Huffing she crossed her arms about her chest and turned around. "Pffff, I don´t care."

A mischievous grin worked its way onto his face when he grabbed a handful of snow and stepped slowly towards her. "Well, well..." By now he had come so close that he just had to lean a tiny bit forwards to whisper in her ear. "You know, Evelyn...you are quite right. I AM evil."

Before she could make any move or reply, he quickly grabbed the back of her coat collar and stuffed the snow down her back.

Evelyn gasped in shock as the wet coldness made contact to her skin and she flung around immediately. "You..." Enraged she stomped towards Murdoch, but he was faster. Snickering like a boy he turned around and started to run.

Evelyn gaped at his retreating form. This impossible..."Wait you moron!" She shouted and started to dash after him.

In front of a church Murdoch finally slithered to a halt and put his hands on his knees to draw some breath. He was still laughing and panting when Evelyn arrived a moment later, her breathing equally shallow. "I...should...definitely...strangle...you...but...I...don´t...think...I...can...find...the...strength", she panted and looked at him. Unable to stop herself she started to laugh as well.

Some passing people shot them curious and somewhat disapproving glances but Murdoch didn´t care. After a few moments he straightened his composure and saw Evelyn do the same.

"You know, William, you are quite impressive. Who knew and old man like you could run so fast..."

He lifted an eyebrow. "Careful Madame, or else I fear I have to get you some snow again."

Before she could make any reply a faint sound reached their ears and made them stop their mocking argue. They heard a carol start up inside the little church.

Evelyn went rigid and her earlier giddiness was replaced immediately by a stinging pain in her heart. Slowly she started to walk. The singing grew louder as she approached the church. Evelyn felt her throat constricting. It reminded her so forcefully of her home, of her father reading stories to her, of the presents under a Christmas tree, of the smell of candles and simply home. She had had declined Murdoch´s suggestion to attend to a service on Christmas Eve and now she knew why she had done so. Unable to stop herself she felt salty tears down her cheeks; the memories too strong and too painful.

Suddenly she felt a warm arm and hand wrapping around her shoulders and she was pulled against a solid body. Murdoch didn´t ask any questions, he simply stood beside her and offered as much comfort as he could. "Do you want to go inside?" he asked softly, but she just shook her head and closed her eyes to listen more intently to the faint music.

XxxxxX

In the evening Evelyn and Will sat together in the living room next to each other on the sofa and he was again showing her various pictures of his family. Laughing he gestured to one of the pictures "You see those ugly shoes my aunt got her? Poor Peg, she was so disappointed. They were of a horrible strange red colour." By now Evelyn had learned that William harboured a strong affection for his older sister Margaret - or Peg – as he called her. "Three days after Christmas she got herself some paint and tried to paint those shoes black. I´ve never seen my mother so flustered before."

Evelyn giggled and shook her head. Secretly she envied him about his family.

"I wished I´d know them all", she told him. He glanced towards her. "After we are back from New York I will definitely visit my family. If you´d like, you could accompany me. I am sure they´ll like you and by then we hopefully won´t have to play our ridiculous charade anymore."

When "ridiculous charade" reached her ears, she felt a sudden prang in her heart but she smiled sweetly nonetheless. "Yes, sure. I´d love that."

He petted her head. "It´s settled then, lassie. I´ll take you to bonnie Scotland in May." Suddenly something dawned on him and he observed her closely.

Evelyn became somewhat uncomfortable under his intense stare and she started to squirm slightly. "Is anything wrong?"

He locked eyes with her. "No", he drawled, "it´s just...I noticed that I don´t know anything about you actually."

She gazed at him questioningly and obviously also rather unsure. "There´s not much to say to be honest", she started softly. "But if you insist...I was born in Cornwall. You know, I´ve never known my mother because she died whilst giving birth to me. I am looking very similar to her, I am told."

"My late condolences, Evelyn, but your mother must have been a lovely person then."

She blushed. "Don´t mock me, William. I am fully aware that I am not the most attractive woman on this planet. However...after my mother had died, my father left Cornwall with me and moved to Oxfordshire where he was born. He raised me on his own and I had a truly wonderful childhood."

Her eyes had lit up and her voice dropped to a distant and happy tone. "You know, the Christmas Carol at the church reminded me a great deal of it. My father used to read stories to me and sometimes he even sang at Christmas Eve. Those are treasured memories."

"You love him very much, don´t you?" he asked and saw her nod her head.

"Yes, I do. But as you surely know all good things come to an end."

Murdoch´s eyes went soft. Somehow he knew her next sentence before she actually said it. "He died, right?"

Evelyn nodded and desperately tried not to cry again. "Yes, he died when I was twelve. He was...ill. After my father´s death I was sent by my aunt to a college in Oxford and I studied there until I turned eighteen. Shortly after my graduation I gained my position as junior librarian here in Southampton library and that´s all. The rest know you already."

Murdoch gulped and observed the girl before him closer. She was way too young to have lived a life like that. And suddenly he felt bad about asking her and provoking painful memories in the process. Desperate to lighten the mood he mocked her. "Oxford...I´m impressed, Evelyn. I guess that´s the reason why I can´t hear any accent in your talking."

That comment made her actually grin again. "Quite right, William. In contrast to you I can speak properly."

He chuckled. "Well, lassie, yer think your ears can bear my gruesome Scottish accent a bit longer to hear some wee stories about my unsteady seafaring life?"

She smiled at his thickened accent and inwardly felt glad that he had changed the subject. "I´d love to."

XxxxxxxxxxX

Boxing Day arrived and reminded Murdoch that his work would start all over the next day. He spent most of the day in his office and did some paperwork. Evelyn made sure not to disturb him and got herself busy with washing his uniforms, ironing his shirts and sewing a button back on his coat.

It was already late in the afternoon when Murdoch finally finished his tasks and headed down the stairs, only to find Evelyn sitting in the armchair and obviously deeply engrossed in a book. Paul was dosing peacefully in her lap. Whatever she was reading seemed to be rather appealing to her because she was chewing on her lip and apparently hadn´t heard him enter the room.

"Would you like a cup of tea?" he asked her and had to hide a grin when her eyes shot up at him. Obviously he had indeed startled her.

Evelyn didn´t answer. Instead her eyes started strangly to roam over him before finally settling on a part of his body that made him feel quite uncomfortable.

He cleared his throat. "Can I help you somehow?"

Relieved he saw that her eyes travelled northwards again until they locked with his own.

"Perhaps...I wonder..." Without finishing her sentence she shook her head and gazed down at her book again.

Murdoch raised an eyebrow. "Care to enlighten me?" He stepped closer to get a look at what she was reading. To his surprise he recognized a book about Scottish traditions and culture he had in his library.

Quickly her eyes darted upwards again. She knew she shouldn´t be asking him something like that but she just HAD to know. Gathering every bit of courage she had she straightened her chest. "I wonder...if it is true."  
"And what would that be, lassie?"

She squirmed nervously under his gaze. "Have you ever worn a kilt, Mr. Murdoch?"

Suddenly it dawned on him. That little witch... "Are you trying to insult me? Of course I have worn a kilt. Many many times to be precise. And since when is it "Mr. Murdoch" again?"

Evelyn ignored his last comment and observed his body again very closely. "Well...then you should be able to tell me. What I mean is...ehm...is it true? The thing about the kilts?"

"I totally have no clue what you are talking about, lovvie. What do you mean exactly? There are many things among a man´s kilt", he answered with fake innocence. He knew fully well what she was referring to.

"What I mean is...argh bloody hell. Do you Scots wear anything underneath or not?" she blurted out and blushed a deep crimson.

Murdoch burst out into roaring laughter. "Have I ever told you that you are a feisty brat, Evelyn?" he asked whilst wiping his eyes. "But to answer your question. It depends on."

"Depends on what?" He was clearly enjoying her embarrassment and she hated him therefore.

"Well, a true Scotsman doesn´t indeed wear anything under his kilt."

She closed her eyes in embarrassment, but her curiosity – once awoken – forced her to ask the inevitable. "And...are you a true Scotsman, William?"

That question made him laugh out so hard that he had to sit down on the table. After a few moments he straightened his composure and caught her annoyed stare. An idea formed in his mind as he got up and walked ever so slowly towards her. Evelyn´s eyes widened when he came nearer until he literally towered over her, his eyes carrying a hooded expression. Slowly he laid his hands on both of the armchairs and drew his face nearer to her own. Evelyn backed away until her head collided with the back of the armchair. She was trapped. For a silly moment she actually thought that he would kiss her but he just brought his mouth very close to her ear so that she could feel his warm breath against her cheek. "Guess!"

When he backed away he basked in her scandalized expression. "You´re mean."

"Come on, I´m not the one who brought this up. I´m not the pervert here!"

She drew a deep breath through her nose. "I´m not pervert!"

"Yes you are. After all you are thinking about me wandering around naked down there", to her utter shock he pointed downwards his body, "but I won´t tell you lassie. Not on your nelly!"

"Fine then, don´t tell me. I don´t really want to know anyway."

"Come on Evelyn, of course you want to know that. But I´ll tell you so much...I am actually going to wear my kilt soon. So let´s see if you find the courage to sort out the answer to your question on your own."  
"I...you...William!" she gasped and buried her face into her hands, desperately ignoring his laughter.

When she had the nerve to look up again she was met by an amused stare. How she wished to slap him at the moment.

Instead she composed herself and asked: "Why are you planning to wear a kilt, sir?"

Murdoch raised his eyebrows. "Oh my, I nearly forgot to tell you. We are invited, you and me. My best friend Charles Lightoller and his wife Sylvia are having their annual New Year´s Eve party and we both are invited. And being a proud (he emphasised the word proud) Scotsman, I will of course wear my traditional attire on that occasion."

To his surprise that news seemed to scare her. "Invited? And how many people will be there?"

"Oh, quite a few. It´s usually a really big party. Most of our comrades and fellow officers will be there."

Evelyn gulped and started to wring her hands nervously. "You don´t have to worry, Evelyn. Nobody is going to harm you there. You´re going to have fun."

"That´s not the point, William. Did it ever occur to you that we actually have to act like an engaged couple there?"

Her question caught him off guard. Admittedly he hadn´t thought about that. Against his own feelings he tried to reassure her. "Don´t worry lassie, it will be fine. Lights knows about our situation and the others won´t notice. We simply have to act civilised with each other for that one evening. But we simply can´t decline that invitation."

Evelyn gazed at him thoroughly unconvinced, but she nodded ever so slightly.

XxxxxxxxX

In the late evening hours Murdoch sat brooding on his bed and observed something in his hand. The conversation he had had earlier with her had reminded him of something. Should he really do this? Damn, why was life always so complicated? And why had Evelyn have to be so incalculably?

He stood up and started pacing. Again. It seemed to become a habit. Honestly he dreaded her reaction but on the other hand it was inevitable, wasn´t it? After all they HAD to pretend to be engaged.

Taking a deep steadying breath he left his room. Sometimes a man had to do what a man needed to do.

Evelyn had already gone to bed but he hoped that she would be still awake. He didn´t know if he could find the courage to do what he was going to do if he waited until the next day.

Hesitantly he stopped before the door of her room and ever so slowly raised his hand to knock.

A few seconds later Evelyn´s surprised voice reached his ears. "Come in."

He opened the door and stepped inside her room only to stop dead in his tracks. She sat on her back clad in a nightgown and her hair fell in loose curls around her shoulders. Obviously she had wrapped her dressing gown around her in a great haste.

"William...has something happened?" she asked him clearly surprised about his late visit. Somehow he seemed to be extremely nervous.

"Happened is the wrong word, I guess, but I have to discuss something important."

Her eyes widened slightly disbelievingly. "And that can´t wait until tomorrow?" Apparently she was rather nervous having him around in her room whilst she was in a state of undress.

Discreetly his eyes wandered up and down her form and he couldn´t help but admire his view.

_Come on, Will, you´re here for another reason_

He cleared his throat and locked eyes with her. "No, it can´t wait. Evelyn...what I want to say is...well. As you said yourself, we still have to pretend to be engaged to each other. And that made me think of something." He stepped a bit closer towards her. "I don´t want to take advantage of you or suggest anything, but...I thought that people could wonder why my fiancée doesn´t wear a ring."

Evelyn gulped but was unable to break their eye contact. She felt heat creeping up her neck and her heart started to bump like mad. He wouldn´t...would he?

Slowly Murdoch grabbed into his trouser pocket and produced a little box. With great care he opened it and Evelyn´s eyes fell upon a delicate silver ring with a small Sapphire in the middle.

"This is my grandmother´s engagement ring. She gave it to me before she died and I promised her to give it to my very special woman one day...to my fiancée. You see, that fiancée never came but here you are and although we don´t love each other I can honestly say that you are at least a very special woman to me. So...as part of our little love play...would you do me the honour and wear this ring? Consider it as a loan until the day you don´t need it anymore."

Unable to say a word she just stared at him with wide eyes and a flushed face.

When she didn´t answer, he became surprisingly disappointed and started to get up. "I´m sorry, it was a silly idea. Forget it."

He was about to turn around and leave the room when she snapped out of her trance and quickly got up. "William, wait!"

Immediately he turned towards her again. She cleared her throat.

"Forgive me, but this came a bit...unexpected. But, ehm, maybe you are right." Slowly she locked eyes with him. "If you still want me to wear this, I´ll do it. I promise, I will treasure your grandmothers ring until the day I can return it to you."

Unable to help himself he smiled wickedly at her. "Very well then, Miss Watson. If you please give me your hand? I guess you don´t mind if I don´t go down to my knees in front of you?"

She giggled. "No good sir. It´s perfectly fine." Not able to look into his eyes, she fixed the wall behind his head and raised her left hand.

Hesitantly he grasped her hand in his and carefully slid the ring onto her small ring finger. "There."

Not daring to look onto her hand or into his eyes, she nodded.

An awkward silence settled between them until Murdoch cleared his throat a few moments later. "Very well then. I´m glad that we sort this out. I´ll better leave now and let you rest. Good night, Evelyn, sleep well."

"Goodnight William", she said and gladly released the breath she was holding when she heard the door clunk shut.

Unable to really believe what had just happened she stumbled backwards until she landed on her bed and lifted her left hand. The ring fit surprisingly snuck on her finger and the Sapphire glistened softly in the dim light. Her heart bumped wildly in her chest and she knew that no sleep would come to her this night.


End file.
